I Should Tell You
by UndergroundValentine
Summary: Tommy is kind of a sex-fiend bent on getting into everyone's pants, and Adam's got a bit of an... interesting secret. Of course fate puts them together as college roommates. WARNING: M for language, sexual content, crude humor, and cross-dressing.
1. Another Time, Another Place

Hey y'all. UndergroundValentine here with HieiTheFallen in another collaboration. We do not own Adam Lambert, Tommy Joe Ratliff, Cassidy Haley, Brad Bell, Drake LaBry, or any other mentioned characters. However, my wife owns the character Hiei (one of Adam's mentioned ex-boyfriends) as that is an original character of hers. At any rate, we hope you enjoy the ride. :)

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Chapter One: I Should Tell You… No! Another Time, Another Place  
Adam's POV**

A year ago, I started college. I am just entering my sophomore year of college and to be honest, it sucks. Last year, I had a dorm room all to myself so I didn't have to put up with some whiny kid's bullshit or if they found out I was gay, I didn't have to worry about them thinking I was going to rape them in their sleep or something (like seriously, what the fuck?). But this year, I have to share a dorm room with the horniest fucker I've ever met in my life.

Thomas Joseph Ratliff.

He's a pretty boy, I'll give him that and he generally dresses in attire that makes him look mysterious and attractive to everyone (girl or not) but that's just all part of his game. He's a sex addict, I'm sure. Every day when I come home from classes, usually with a lot of homework to do, he's got a girl half naked or fully naked on his bed and they're… doing things a gay man wouldn't exactly want to see, basically.

It really bothers me, one because I am gay and I don't really want to watch some girl get fucked or hear her nasty fucking noises, but two because it's just plan rude. If you have a roommate, you respect that and you don't bring home a girl to fuck every other night when you know you're going to have someone else there, kind of because that person lives there with you! Maybe if it was true love, I'd feel a little differently, but it never is. Not with Tommy. He's… how do I put this nicely? He's basically a man-whore. Every time he brings a girl home, it's a different girl. Never the same one twice. By the end of the year, he'll probably have fucked every pretty girl on the fucking campus and it's sad really, because lot of them seem to really like Tommy. It's not just a hook-up for them, but once he finishes, he basically kicks them out on their asses and probably never talks to them again.

Frankly, I find his behavior repulsive and I keep communications with him down to a bare minimal. We've even hung up some old theatre currents (like the big velvet ones) up to divide our space. I'm a theatre and performing major, so when the theatre department bought new ones, I asked if I could have the old ones. They help with the noise levels a little, but not enough to keep them from my ears. It's hard to do because I have such sensitive hearing, but it would still be kind of nice if he would at least attempt to have the chick over when I wasn't around. I have rehearsals for shows and shit all the fucking time. I'm out a lot, just trying to get stuff for school done, but he seems to go out of his way to make sure I see it… I don't know if he's trying to impress me or make me jealous or what. Whatever, Ratliff, whatever. I'm definitely not jealous of the girls you fuck.

There is, actually, another reason I keep my distance from Tommy aside from his man-whorishness and the fact that I'm gay. I… I'm not exactly a "normal person" but I don't want to go into much detail about it. The two people I actually have been with sexually understood but most people would think I was some sort of freak. Word would spread around campus and I would never be able to live a normal life. Well, the type of life I wanted to live anyway. Performing and theatre isn't exactly the definition of normal but if anyone were to find out… I probably wouldn't be able to do that either.

Like I said, I'm not telling you what it is. I don't want anyone but the people who absolutely need to know, know. I allowed the two people I've been intimate with to know because I loved them… A lot and I trusted them. In both cases, we never actually broke up. One was because he moved to a different country because his parents weren't actually citizens of the United States. The other was separation because _I_ moved away. I left for college and to follow my dreams, but he couldn't follow me… Thinking about either of them makes my heart ache because I still love them both very much…

God, I'm such a drama queen sometimes.

Today I was getting back to the dorm a bit late. I was cast as the Phantom in our production of _The Phantom of the Opera_ and we had rehearsal all the way through today, plus working on stage set and ordering costumes. I love performing, but the hassle of getting everything ready for the performance was a huge headache all the time. When I actually did get back to my dorm room, I was in a bit of a hurry because I had a lot of homework to do and a little amount of time to actually get it done.

As soon as I unlocked the door with my key card and walked inside, I knew I would be getting nothing done tonight, because right before my eyes was Tommy, mostly naked and a pretty-faced girl with huge breasts (no shirt, just a bra), a tight skirt and open legs laying underneath him. I couldn't really see any of the girl's nether regions but I knew she wasn't wearing panties. How did I know that? Because they were fucking laying in the middle of the god damn floor for everyone to fucking see.

Heat spread across my face, both from embarrassment caused from what I was seeing and anger. I simply couldn't take this anymore. I could _not_ handle seeing and hearing Tommy fuck every single thing that had a pussy he could fit his bulk into. This was the final straw. "Fuck, Tommy, every single fucking day? Do you have to have sex with everything that moves?" I shouted at him. The girl looked over at me, anger and annoyance written all over her face, but I didn't care. As far as I was concerned, I was doing her a favor if I stopped Tommy from having sex with her. She'd only regret it tomorrow.

"Dude, chill out. I do not have sex with everything that moves. Just cause I can get a girl and you ca-" That's when I hit him. Not with my fist, but my extremely heavy messenger bag.

"It's call having manners, Tommy! You can't just have every girl over every single night and expect me to be okay with listening to you have sex with her. We're not in different rooms! We've just got this stupid curtain in between out beds," I hissed, ready to hit him again. The girl looked horrified and was struggling to pull her shirt back on. It was really only half way on when she grabbed her panties and ran out. Tommy looked like he was fuming.

"That was so not cool. What the fuck is your problem? I was fucking about to get laid!" he shouted at me and I sighed, tossing all of my school crap onto my side of the curtain. I had absolutely no desire to start or finish homework now.

I rolled my eyes in response. "Yeah, like that would be so fucking amazing. It happens like every fucking night, Tommy. Could you just… give it a rest already? You could at least put a sock on the door or take her somewhere else so I don't have to listen to it and _see_ it."

"Why are you getting so upset about this? Just bring home some girls of your own. I won't mind. I mean, it can't be that hard for you to get one. You've got that whole sensitive, cute, emo kid feel about you. Chicks love that," he said.

Once again I rolled my eyes. Did he even hear himself talking? He sounded so ridiculous! "I'm not emo! And I don't want to bring girls here," I exclaimed. Fuck. Blew it…

I must have caught Tommy off guard too. He probably was conceited enough to think I was jealous of all the action he was getting. "Why not? Every guy likes to fuck around once in a while. Just pick a pretty girl, nail her and send her on her way," he said. Fuck, he is so insensitive to everything and everybody. I was beginning to think I was living with a sociopath because he didn't seem to have any emotions beside, maybe, horny-ness, if you could even consider that an emotion.

"Tommy… Fine, you want the truth then? Fine, I'll give it to you. I think what you do to those girls is really fucked up. Sure, some of them just want the sex like you do, but some of them actually have feelings for you and you twist and manipulate those feeling until she agrees to sleep with you. Then you just kick her out and shatter her heart into a million pieces. That's just… it's not right, Tommy. That hurts people, you know," I said, putting my hands on my hips.

A frown tugged Tommy's plump, girly lips into a frown. "That's your reason? Come on, give me a fucking break. That can't be why it upsets you so much. What kind of guy thinks like that, honestly?" Rah, this boy was seriously fucked up…

"A gay one. That's right. I'm gay, okay? So please stop bringing over your skanky one night stand girlfriends because I'm really tired of seeing breasts and pussy," I snapped. I didn't care anymore. I was kind of in the closet about being gay but I simply could not keep it to myself anymore. Especially not with this little fucker. Maybe he would respect the fact and stop bringing girls here. I highly doubted it, but it was worth a fucking shot.

I had a minute of satisfaction when Tommy's expression was in between completely blank and totally confused. But my triumph didn't last very long because his totally chill all the time face kicked back in with a little smirk curving his lips upward. "Oh really now?" he asked, practically teasing me. "I didn't know that…"

Fire started to spread over my cheeks like a fucking forest fire. "Yes really… Why? Is that a problem?" I asked, jumping onto the defensive.

His response was a simple smile, very boyish, cute and innocent. "No, 'course not. Got nothing against gay boys," he said and for a second, I was falling for his charm and good looks. _Adam, do not think about him like that. Don't ever let yourself think about him like that. One, he's straight, and two, even if he wasn't, he would just fucking tear your heart to shreds. You do not want that. Think about Hiei and Drake. Those are the kind of boys you want to be with not… not_ this.

A sigh rolled off my lips. Just thinking about Hiei and Drake made me sad. Hiei was an Egyptian boy whose parents had moved to the United States for a few years. He never really told me why, but he tried so hard to stay. I didn't work out in his favor and he was forced to go back to Egypt. I got together with Drake several months after Hiei left. At first it wasn't really romantic, but he made me feel better after being so depressed about Hiei leaving and eventually I fell for him hook, line and sinker. But when I decided to go to college, I also had to leave him… and I sometimes regret that. A lot. Both relationships were intimate and I loved them both deeply, but someone like Tommy? God, I could never even think of getting naked with someone like Tommy.

"Good… then can you please just take your dates somewhere else? I don't care how many girls you fuck, as long as I don't have to see it…" I muttered. It did bother me how Tommy used girls, but I couldn't really do anything about it. It was his business, not mine. He just made it mine by showing me the girl's vaginas.

Tommy smiled at me. "Sure Adam. I'll… take it somewhere else, just for you," he said, almost sweetly. Okay, what the fuck that was so weird. I would never understand Tommy but he was almost creeping me out at the moment.

"Erm… thanks… appreciate it," I mumbled and walked behind the massive curtain to sit on my bed. I had a lot of things to process through my mind, and I didn't necessarily want to. But when did you ever get what you wanted anymore?


	2. Flirt with a Stranger

**Chapter Two: Flirt with a stranger**

**Tommy's POV**

Initially, when I found out that I was going to be rooming with a sophomore named Adam Lambert, I didn't think anything of it. I just figured that he'd be some other guy rooming with me in college. Maybe we could mash out on Left 4 Dead and drink beer or Mountain Dew, but maybe not. I didn't know. Then again, my initial image of Adam was about one-hundred miles in the opposite direction on the spectrum of a man. I imagined— kinda— blond hair, regular eyes, football-y kind of guy, or a total nerd, one of the two.

What did I get?

Tall; long legs and broad shoulders. Black hair that seemed to shine and hang perfectly around his face. Creamy complexion of the skin, freckles on the lips. Startling, bright blue eyes that seemed to smile with a light of their own. In an all around perfect sense, Adam Lambert was probably one of the most beautiful men I had ever seen in my life. When I met him, he was wearing charcoal skinny jeans, snakeskin boots, a loose fitting blue plaid shirt over a black tank top. He… My first impression was, quite literally, "damn".

We didn't say much, that I kind of remember. In fact, so far this year, we've barely spoken at all. Kind of a downer, in my opinion. But I was the school's Don Draper, if you know what I mean, and I guess Adam just wasn't into that. If I was at our room before him he wouldn't talk to me when he came back from classes. And if he was there before I came up, he made no interest in talking… Not even a hello.

Shitty.

But… Adam was the exact opposite of me. He was this tall, broad and gorgeous guy with amazing blue eyes (and quite the motherfucking voice, from what I'd heard), and me? I was short, blond, dull brown eyes and pale as fuck. Adam was smart and, well, kinda graceful about what he did, even if it was walking. I wasn't smart and I fucked around too much. Adam was a Theatre and choir kid and I was a skater boy who played bass and screwed every girl (and the occasional guy) in school.

Yeah, I'm bi. So what? I like beautiful girls and beautiful boys, nothing wrong with that. I can appreciate the curves as well as the pole…

That sounded really bad. Anyway!

I should have known, early on, that he wasn't going to be one of those types that favored whores. I mean, I wouldn't admit to be a whore (well, man-whore) but I'd heard the term and my name put into sentences behind my back, and I tried not to let it bother me (because really, I didn't fucking care. As long as I got laid, I was happy). But I still remember the first or second week when I started bringing girls home, I could see the… disapproving look, so to speak, in Adam's eye…

For some reason… it bothered me. But I thought maybe he'd get over the girls I brought home. That he'd just ignore it and we could (maybe) find some common ground in which to breed some form of a friendship. And I should have known that was a little too far into the wishful thinking. I really, really should have.

There's a lot of things I _should_ know. Like— the obvious; being between a girl's thighs (for the fourth time that week) when Adam came to the room… Bad idea.

"Fuck, Tommy, every single fucking day? Do you have to have sex with everything that moves?" He shouted at me. I turned my head to look at him and I could feel the anger pulsing off of his being from across the room. If you were to ask me the girl's name, I wouldn't be able to tell you. If I thought enough about it, I could probably tell you her first name, but seeing Adam's enraged and irritated face— I lost all thought.

"Dude, chill out. I do not have sex with everything that moves. Just cause I can get a girl and you ca-" I began to say. And then he hit me with his bag… and I flopped down onto the floor, howling briefly and rubbing my face while also readjusting myself and pulling my pants back up.

"It's call having manners, Tommy! You can't just have every girl over every single night and expect me to be okay with listening to you have sex with her. We're not in different rooms! We've just got this stupid curtain in between out beds!" Adam shouted at me, and from my position on the floor, I glared up at him, fuming with confusion and irritation as the chick grabbed her shit and fled the room. Wow. Thanks, Adam.

"That was so not cool. What the fuck is your problem? I was fucking about to get laid!" I told him, motioning angrily towards the door with one hand. He sighed, dropping his bag onto the floor on his side of the curtain. He looked tired and pissed off. When I think about it— I don't blame him.

"Yeah, like that would be so fucking amazing. It happens like every fucking night, Tommy. Could you just… give it a rest already? You could at least put a sock on the door or take her somewhere else so I don't have to listen to it and _see_ it." This was so fucking ridiculous. This whole argument. If he was so angered by my getting some on a nightly basis, why didn't he just go out and do it himself, too? He had the looks and the charm…

"Why are you getting so upset about this? Just bring home some girls of your own. I won't mind. I mean, it can't be that hard for you to get one. You've got that whole sensitive, cute, emo kid feel about you. Chicks love that!" I told him, voicing my thoughts with different wording. But, if anything, my answer made him even angrier.

"I'm not emo! And I don't want to bring girls here," he said, sounding _really_ tired. I frowned. Why not bring girls over? Let's have a motherfucking party!

"Why not? Every guy likes to fuck around once in a while. Just pick a pretty girl, nail her and send her on her way." I told him as a matter-of-fact type of deal. It's what I had done for the past, what, two or three months? It really wasn't that hard. Give a girl a wild night and the just forget about it. Like working with a hooker.

I should have listened to Adam instead of firing back at him. I mean, don't get me wrong, I heard what he was saying, but his answer sounded… strange. Like his thoughts about my actions were a little textbook-y… "That's just… it's not right, Tommy. That hurts people, you know." He finished with his hands on his hips, shaking his head and looking really disappointed and disgusted with me. I looked away for a moment, gnawing on my bottom lip before looking back up at him, feeling my throat closing with irritation.

"That's your reason? Come on, give me a fucking break. That can't be why it upsets you so much. What kind of guy thinks like that, honestly?" I asked him, folding my arms on my knees before drawing them up towards my chest.

"A gay one. That's right. I'm gay, okay? So please stop bringing over your skanky one night stand girlfriends because I'm really tired of seeing breasts and pussy." I felt my stomach drop through the floor. Of course. _Of course_. It… It suddenly made sense. The gorgeous looks, the sensitive and soft side, the beautiful voice and impeccable taste for fashion, the _eyeliner_.

The look of shock and confusion that must've been on my face initially melted and I smiled sweetly at him. Maybe… Maybe he wasn't jealous of _me _getting all the girls. Maybe he was jealous of the _girls_ getting their shot with _me_. I've been told I'm… quite the charming and sexy guy (from many men and women, hurhur)… But as much as my mind wanted to believe that Adam just wanted my body, the clench in my chest at the look on his face was whispering otherwise…

"Oh, really now?" I asked, my voice just above a soft murmur. The rest of the night was uneventful; I told Adam I had nothing against gay boys when he asked if there was a problem. He went to his half of the room and I remained in mine, plugging my ears with my headphones and blasting Manson into my ears, my arms tucked behind my head and my eyes closed.

I really should have known that Adam was gay the second I met him. But that part of me just didn't click in my brain. And… if I was smart I would have left well enough alone. But there was something in me that wanted to prove to Adam that I wasn't some panty-snatching twenty-year-old college student with the hopes of getting into a band.

And yet I was.

…

Fuck. My. Life.


	3. And They Took You For a Working Whore

**Chapter Three: And They Took You For a Working Whore… (which you are)  
Adam's POV**

Last night was still buzzing through my mind. I couldn't concentrate in my advanced calc class this morning and the history of theatre wasn't retained at all. When he dismissed class, I realized I couldn't remember anything of what he said. I was too preoccupied with what Tommy and I had talked about last night. Well, what I yelled at him anyway.

I admitted to him that I was gay… I hadn't told many people that. Sure, my parents knew, Monte knew and obviously my old boyfriends knew, but I'd never been open with outsiders about it. My sexuality was between me, my partner and my penis… Now Tommy Joe knew I was a homosexual… An overly-dramatic faggot in his eyes, probably… Why was I still thinking about him anyway? And why did I care so much about what Tommy thought of me anyway? As long as he didn't bring over his girls anymore, I didn't care.

Would Tommy actually stop bringing girls to our dorm room? It seemed really unlikely, considering Tommy's appetite for sex. I hoped he would keep it in his pants or take it somewhere else, but chances were, when I went back to our dorm, he'd be laying in between some other hoe's thighs. _Adam, stop thinking about it…_ In reality, I wasn't jealous of Tommy getting to fuck girls or girls getting fucked by Tommy, but I was extremely jealous of the fact that Tommy had that intimacy. It made me crave Hiei or Drake laying down between _my_ thighs. And thinking about Tommy having sex made me yearn for the feeling of being intimate.

Only… Tommy didn't do it because he loved the person he was fucking. He did it because he was in love with the feeling of the act we call sex. It was disgusting the way he would just… fuck any girl that would give him the time of day. That fact bothered me a lot more than it should. What did I care if Tommy fucked every girl that showed him a nipple or a nice view of her ass?

"Mr. Lambert?" asked my professor. Now I was my script writing class, and I was completely spacing. Honestly, I had no idea what was going on but everyone was staring at me and for a second I thought the worst. That they could all see me t-… Oops, you don't know that.

"Huh? Yeah? Oh… sorry…" I muttered, a light blush sweeping over my cheeks.

A frown answered me. "I was asking you what the main idea of your script is, and what your character's roles are," he said, putting his hands flat on my desk and leaning towards me. Fuck! I didn't write my script because of Tommy… Shit.

"I… uh… Well, it's about a girl who is in love with a man-whore and they have sex… Then he dumps her and she needs to figure out how to process and deal with the heart ache," I said. Wow, that could actually potentially make a good story. Who would have thought that Tommy could provide inspiration for something so important and creative.

Dr. Kline raised an eyebrow. "Is that so? Sounds extremely interesting. May I see your script?" he asked me.

"Uh, no sir… I'm sorry but I was running late this morning and forgot to put it in my bag…" I hated lying but I didn't want to lose credit for the class, especially if my made up story was going to get me an A. I'd just… write it tonight and turn it in the next time I had this class, which was the day after tomorrow.

"Well… I usually don't accept late work but you seem to be an honest, hard working student, so I will accept it next class period, but be prepared to discuss it with the entire class," he said. Great, on top of writing the damned script, I had to present it too? Fuck. My. Life. I probably won't even be able to do it, because chances are, Tommy completely ignored what I said and will be laying between some other girl's thighs when I got back. Joy to the fucking world.

"Thank you sir…" I muttered, looking back down at the table. Shit, I had so much to get done in two nights… And knowing Tommy, I wasn't going to get ANY of it done. Shit…

The rest of class we review classic plays by Shakespeare. Honestly, I knew almost all of his plays backwards and forwards. I've always been a theatre dweeb. Hiei was the first person who ever thought I was cool for it. He absolutely loved the fact that I was so passionate about it. Ha ha, once he even told me it turned him on… Horny, cute as fuck fucker… God I miss him so much _Stop thinking about him, Adam… Just stop. You're ganna end up crying…_

A sigh left my lips as class was finally dismissed. It was my last class of the day with no rehearsal tonight, thank god, and I started my walk back to my dorm room. Part of me prayed Tommy just wouldn't be there so I could get some work done, but my luck was never that great…

My mind was making a mental list of things I needed to get done so I could turn them in on time. I hadn't even thought of Tommy because I was so occupied with the work I had to get done, but as soon as I came to the door of our dorm, I was hesitant on opening it because I was almost sure he'd be shoving his dick into some other slut's vagina. Ugh! So fucking nasty. There are just some things a gay man shouldn't see, and guess what? I've seen them thanks to Thomas.

When I walked in, I was completely shocked to see Tommy, alone, sitting crossed legged on his bed with a book propped open. I didn't even know Tommy knew how to read… Okay, that was a little on the mean side, but I didn't know he read for the just the hell of reading it… His head snapped up and his chocolate eyes lingered on me for a minute before a little smile graces his ever famous girly lips. "Hey Adam, how was your day?" he asked.

Whoa, since when do Tommy and I ever communicate? And when did he ever care about me or my life? "Uh, I have a shit load of homework to do…" I mumbled, going over to my side of the room. I heard a soft shuffle and Tommy appeared on my side of the curtain. Oh Rah, why does he want to talk all of a sudden?

"Whatchya got?" he asked, leaning against the wall beside my bed.

"I have to write a script, do my math homework, write an essay and study for an exam… Why?" I asked rather coldly. I was still miffed about yesterday but Tommy didn't seem to notice. He just smiled at me and moved a little closer to where I was now sitting on my bed. Okay, Tommy, you can go back to your side of the curtain now… seriously.

He frowned at me and leaned over, looking down at the work I was pulling out of my bag. "Damn, seems like a heavy workload. Do you need any help?" he asked me and what was the funniest thing? He actually sounded sincere about his offer, not that I would take the help of a straight D student.

"No Tommy… I don't need any help," I mumbled, keeping my head down in attempts to give him a hint to get lost. Of course that didn't work… Tommy wanted something from me but… what? What could I possibly give to him? We're not really that great of friends… Actually we aren't friends at all. We're exact opposites, and yeah, in science opposites attract but in real life? No, opposites did not attract and they actually had a hard time getting along at all…

Tommy sat down on the edge of my bed. "Well, maybe we could order some food or something? Maybe a nice dinner would help calm you down? What would you like to eat? My treat," he said, flashing me a surprisingly white smile. Someone like Tommy just didn't seem like the type of person to have suck nice teeth…

"Tommy, what are you doing?" I asked, frowning at him. Call me suspicious, but I think I have the right to be considering who I was talking to. By the way, this was like the longest conversation we'd ever had since we moved in together.

He smiled at me again. "What do you mean? I just… Kind of feel like an ass for bringing girls over all the time considering you're… gay and all. I just wanna make it up to you and maybe show you I'm not all bad?" he said, still smiling. He ran his fingers through his hair, making his face clearly visible and damn he was really cute… But not the type of person I wanted to be with…

"I… That's nice of you…" I mumbled, pulling my macbook out from its case. "But you don't need to do that… Just don't bring over so many girls…"

"Sure, no problem, but seriously. Let me buy you some dinner? Please?" he asked, almost forming a pout on his lips. What the fuck. This was just too weird…

I sighed against, putting the password into my computer to bring it up. "I… like Chinese food…" I muttered, hoping if I gave him something to do, he'd leave me alone for a little while. Hopefully I could get a good amount of work done in his absenence.

"Oh really? Awesome. I'll go pick some up then," he said, hopping up off my bed. He turned his head back to me, looking me from my head to my sock-covered feet. "By the way, you're rocking those skinny jeans… Where do you buy them?" he asked, another award winning smile covering his face from ear to ear.

A light blush rushed across my cheeks. Any sort of attention from a cute boy (manwhore or not) made me blush. I was practically red when I was dating Hiei and Drake because everything they said covered me in embarrassment. Now I was blushing for Tommy too? Damn. That's unacceptable… "I… just buy them whenever I find them. I think these ones are from Hot Topic…" I mumbled, letting my eyes fall back onto my computer screen just to avoid looking at the chocolate eyes.

"God, love Hot Topic," he said with a soft chuckle and pulled his shoes on. "I'll be back." He disappeared through the door and while he was gone I managed to get my math homework, my script, and a good portion of my essay done. I worked well under pressure thank Rah, but this was still borderline ridiculous. And the entire time, I was still trying to figure out why Tommy was being so nice to me. Did he actually feel bad about bringing all those girls over when he had a gay roommate? I couldn't imagine he actually felt bad for getting laid all the time… He didn't seem like the remorseful type…

The smell of Chinese food flooded into the room and mouth started to water. I hadn't noticed until then, but I was starving, probably because I hadn't eaten anything at all that day. Sometimes college life did that to you. So busy you didn't even have time to eat… My stomach must have growled because Tommy laughed and damn was his laughter rich… Just like Hiei's actually… "Someone sounds hungry…" he said, kicking the door closed behind him.

"I uh… haven't really eaten anything today… I just didn't have the time to get anything," I mumbled, setting my computer down next to me on the bed. I had it plugged into its charger, so I didn't have to worry about it dying or anything, but just as an extra precaution, I saved my essay before something bad happened to it.

"Well then come get some food. I won't bite you, much," he said, smirking at me and I just rolled my eyes as I got up.

"Ha, you are so not funny," I mumbled, walking over to the short blond. Rah, I never realized just how short he was…

"Oh lighten up. I'm just having a little bit of fun with you," he said, smirking at me. Something in his eyes said that he was hungry and not for food… He put an arm around my shoulder and I shrugged out of his hold. I could have sworn I saw him frown but he didn't say anything. "Go on and eat. I didn't poison it or anything…" he mumbled.

"Thanks…" I mumbled, eyeing him before taking one of the Chinese cartons of food. Probably rice…


	4. Crafty Little Lip Tricks

**Chapter Four: Crafty little lip tricks**

**(Tommy's POV)**

One thing I became painfully aware of when Adam shrugged out of my arm that night: this was going to be a lot harder than I thought.

I had my bag slung over my shoulder as I walked quickly down the hallways of the college campus, passing classes and people as I went. My head was spinning with the math test that I had coming up at the end of the week, the English paper I still had to write that was due in two days (and needed to be, like, five thousand words long or something), not to mention I was expected at a party this weekend on the other side of campus. Not too much of a problem, right?

Wrong.

This was a total problem. Adam wasn't one to date a loser, that I knew. He got great grades and was in every Theatre production our college threw on. I couldn't tell you how he did it and still managed a decent social life and got enough sleep. Remember that old joke? Good grades, a social life, and enough sleep; pick two? Yeah. That. He somehow seemed to manage all fucking three. Jerk. And because he was Mr. Perfect, that meant I had to step my game up. Do good in class, play nice with the friends, stop bringing over whores. It was difficult, to say the least, and I'd only suffered, so far, a day.

People stared at me as I walked. It wasn't uncommon, really. Some knew me for my reputation of being a panty snatcher, others knew me for being one of the best sexual experiences and party-goers ever in existence. A couple of people that I hadn't seen before stared simply for the fact that, as a man, I was damn beautiful. Slim in finger with toned muscles long legs for my size. I wasn't tall, but I had leg, that was certain. Black skinny jeans clung to them, sinfully tight, almost. My black, leather creepers were strapped to my feet, giving me an additional four inches of height. I had a red tank-top on underneath a black fishnet over shirt. Black painted nails and thick eyeliner along my lids; dusted, smoky charcoal eyeshadow (I wasn't afraid to doll myself up, either) graced my lids and my hair was tossed in a sexy mess around my face.

I looked like I was walking onto the set of a high-school themed porno, but with a touch of modesty. In a porno, I'd be wearing booty shorts.

I smirked to myself, walking to the beat of my music as I strode across the open courtyard, heading towards mine and Adam's dorm. I sighed to myself, pulling my bag closer to me as I climbed a small flight of stairs up into another building. I was still trying to figure out how I was going to get Adam to sleep with me. Sure, I knew he didn't like it when I brought girls over, but if I played up my feminine side a little more, I was sure that he'd start to fall for me. But something told me, in the back of my head, that Adam wouldn't be so quick to woo.

I bit down on my bottom lip a little, brushing past boys and girls of all colors, sexualities, sizes and appeal. My eye caught that of a skank in a mini-skirt and she smiled sweetly at me. But before she could think of anything else to draw me in, I was gone, heading farther down the hallway towards the elevators. I had other things on my mind; I made a promise to get what I wanted and, as aggravating at is was, I was sticking to it through and through.

I had walked halfway down the hall before someone fell in step beside me. I didn't need to look over and see who it was, I knew him all too well. He was wearing a pair of dark, burnt red skinny jeans, black and white Converse, a black tank-top and a white, zip up hoodie. His brown hair was lightly tossed about his head, his face recently shaved. I pulled my headphones out of my ears, letting them dangle over the collar of my shirts (the cord ran up the underside of my shirt and out of the way from my bag). We walked, shoulder to shoulder down the hall, our voices low as we spoke. We made everything seem secretive. It was a little game of ours, to be honest. Made everyone think we were scheming. It was often rather entertaining.

"So, what's your progress on Lambert?" He asked me. I scoffed softly, rolling my eyes a little. Brad turned his head towards me, a frown on his lips and in his eyes that I saw from the corner of my eye.

"Not good. All week he's been pushing everything I've got aside. He won't accept my offer to help him when he's loaded with work, he's not swayed by the times I've brought food for him or anything. I don't know what to do, man. He's not like the girls who would fall at a smile and jump at me." Brad laughed quietly, shaking his head and I looked over at him, curious.

"That's because you've really only ever gone after girls. Adam's not a girl, Tommy." I rolled my eyes, shoving him gently.

"I'm aware of that, you ass. And I don't just go after girls." I told him, a touch of playful venom on my tongue and in my tone. Brad just smiled, shifting his bag to the opposite shoulder as we came up to the elevators. He hit the UP button, and we stood there, waiting for a moment.

"David didn't count because you were both drunk." Brad commented, looking over at me with penetrating brown eyes. I sighed again, shaking my head.

"Then what about Isaac?" I retorted, smirking a little to myself. It was Brad's turn to roll his eyes.

"Okay, that's one guy to, what, a good several dozen girls, Tommy? The male to female ratio lies heavily on the pussy, making you inexperienced." Brad explained, and I sighed again. He was right though. I caught the occasional guy, but working with that Y-chromosome was just not my forte, it seemed. I dropped my head a little, rubbing the back of my neck as the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. There was no one else inside, so Brad and I occupied it ourselves.

"Well, you're obviously a motherfucking genius, you tell me. What can I do?" I asked him. I'd be willing to beg on my knees if I had to. Though I knew Brad, if I ever got down before him I wouldn't get back up without a salty, thick taste in my throat. Just saying.

Brad smirked a little, readjusting his bag which looked like it was pulling apart at the seams. Brad was a bit of a music and bookworm. And fashion. And photography. He pretty much was into anything and everything that wasn't sports or Theatre. He turned towards me, his eyes looking me up and down for a moment before he tapped his lips with his index finger. I frowned at him a little, and his smirk stretched into a full-out smile, the LED light-bulb in his head blinking to life.

"Adam's a good looking guy, super smart and talented in Theatre. Keeping those things in mind, he seems like the person who would go for the smaller, cuter boys. Fortunately for you, Tommy, your appearance falls under his possible ideal criteria." Brad said softly, his brown eyes going distant as he thought. He leaned against the wall of the elevator, still talking. "You're best off playing up the things that appeal to him. Wear things that accentuate your petite figure, that make you mysterious to him.

"Maybe doll yourself up once in a while. You're good with makeup, I know. What you've got now is superb, but do this more often." Brad moved, standing in front of me, licking his lips a little before looking down at my chest, and he smirked. "Maybe… Maybe when he's at the dorm, take a shower and come out in like a towel or a pair of pajama pants. Let him see that you've got nipple rings, that might excite him." I rolled my eyes.

"Brad, I'm sure he's already seen them." Brad glanced up at me before smirking again. The elevator dinged and we stepped off, heading towards our dorms. Fortunately, we lived on the same floor, but he was at one end of the hall, I was at the other. Oh well. At least we were relatively close. We stopped by the elevators, still talking.

"He saw you screwing girls. But he didn't see _you_." I frowned, shaking my head a little bit. Brad was a genius, but sometimes I needed him to clarify exactly whatever it was he was trying to tell me. I shook my head a little and he sighed, before continuing. "When Adam would walk in and see you fucking the life out of those chicks, he was only seeing what he wanted to see— or didn't want to see, whatever. If you give him the opportunity to actually see _you_, your body and the things on it or about it, then you've got a stronger chance at getting him into bed with you."

I nodded once, still not completely understanding, but I might as well go along with it all. Brad went back to thinking a little bit, before smiling brightly again. That smile… Whenever I saw that kind of a smile on Brad's face— to be completely honest— I got worried. That was a smile that said "this is foolproof but you're probably not gonna like part of it".

"Brad, what are you thinking?" I asked him, and he looked over at me, still grinning ear to ear before shaking his head.

"Just take my advice, Tommy. Play yourself up. Be nice to him. If he asks you to do something for him, do it and offer anything else he might require. Keep bringing him food. Fuck, you can even start getting him gifts or something, but maybe not right now. Wait a little while. Play up the charm, bring out your sweet-side." He started to turn away from me before he stopped. He looked over his shoulder at me, grinning.

"Oh, and this Halloween, I'm doing your costume." He commented before walking down the hallway. My heart was hammering in my chest as I stared at him, watching him grow smaller and smaller before unlocking and disappearing into his dorm. He was doing my costume?

This can't be good…


	5. Let You Put Your Hands On Me?

**Chapter Five: Let You Put Your Hands On Me, Yeah, NOT  
Adam's POV**

"Oh my God, Cass, he's so disgusting. I have no fucking idea what's gotten into him!" I exclaimed, walking to lunch with my best friend, Cassidy Haley. He's a fashion and design major with a minor in Fine Arts. "He's been really strange since I told him I was gay… Like he wants to get me into bed now that he knows. He's almost… clingy, it seems but this is so fucking strange and I really don't even know if I can handle it anymore!"

Cassidy sighed, linking his arm with mine. Cass was possibly even more gay than I was and it was perfectly normal for two gay men to walk arm in arm down the street. "I really don't understand what the problem is, Adam. Sleep with him. He's fucking hot and he's probably great at what his dick can do. Out of all your fucked up problems, this is definitely the dumbest."

It was my turn to sigh. "Cass, I don't want to just have sex with someone. If I'm going to… let them in between my legs, I want it to mean something, and it's definitely not going to mean anything if I have sex with Tommy. He's a panty snatcher. The only thing he wants is to say he got his shot with me. Then he'll move on to some other sad sucker and I'll be left with the memory of sex without love. Not to mention, I'll have to see his goddamn face every single fucking day."

"I… I see your point," he said, frowning a little. "He's definitely not Hiei or Drake…" Cassidy sighed, leaning his head against my shoulder. He fit nicely against me due to his size.

"No… he isn't," I said, frowning a little. I missed them both so much and… Fuck, how could anyone ever compare to those two? Tommy certainly couldn't. Not with the way he snatches fucking panties all the time. Although, since I've told him I was gay, I haven't seen one pussy in our dorm room. I know he was just trying to make me happy but… well, he had ulterior motives. And he was never going to get what he wanted from me. Not as long as he was the same panty snatching faker he is now.

"You've never considered just fooling around? Having the occasional fuck just for fun?" Cassidy asked me, looking up at me from my shoulder. I just shook my head, keeping my eyes on my boots as I walked.

"Of course not, Cassidy… Sex should be special. It should actually fucking mean something. Sex is like… fucking linked to emotions and if you have sex without meaning, then it's just disgusting. I personally find it wrong to use someone like that for physical pleasure. Sex should feel good but only with someone _special_," I emphasized, pulling Cassidy into a small diner that was about a half mile off of campus. We came here for lunch or dinner a lot and their food was not only great, but fucking affordable. It easily won the award for favorite local restaurant.

The hostess, a young ginger with green eyes smiled at us. She knew us instantly and we knew her. Her name was Olivia and I think was in one of my theater classes. We talked every once in a while, usually when she was working while I was eating here. "Hey Olivia," I said, smiling at the girl. She blushed slight (yeah, she knew I was gay but she got all flustered anyway) and looked between me and Cassidy.

"Hey guys. Want your normal table?" she asked and we nodded. She smiled, waving her hand in a motion that said "follow me" and, of course, we did. She took us to a table in the back of the joint that was set right next to a large window looking over a hill. The sight was beautiful and Cassidy and I found ourselves drawing the scene a lot. Yeah yeah, we're nerds, okay? With a love for art. If we were rally in the mood, we would just lay outside once we were finished eating.

Olivia set down two menus for us and she smiled a little. "You two have a nice lunch, alright?" she requested and with a smile from each of us, she walked away looking pleased with herself.

"Okay, so tell me some more about this problem you've got with Mr. Ratliff," Cassidy said, opening up his menu. He usually tried to get something different every time we came here. It was beginning to get harder and harder merely because we came here so much. He must have tried everything on the menu by now. As for me? I liked to keep it simple with a chicken sandwich and a side of onion rings. I hardly ever got anything different. Once I find something I like, it's hard to switch from that comfort zone. Obviously that's true since I've really only every had two boyfriends…

I sighed, wishing I had a drink to stir and keep me occupied so I didn't have to look at Cassidy. Since I didn't have a distraction, I didn't have much of a choice but to look at him. That's just the kind of person I am. "He had sex with anyone who is willing to take his dick…" I mumbled. "Some of the people he sleeps with actually really like him. It's plainly obvious that they want more than just one fuck, but one he orgasms, it's like all his emotions are gone. He doesn't care about whoever he just fucked, he just cares about the physical feel of fucking somebody. He doesn't care that when he kicks some of those girls out, he's actually tearing their heart apart. It's just… it's wrong…" I stated, trying to sound matter of factly, but I didn't pull that off so well.

"Alright, but what does that have to do with you, Adam?" he asked. A waitress came over and set two drinks down. They didn't need to ask us what we wanted to drink, they already knew and I was glad for that because now I had iced-tea that could easily occupy my hands.

"He wants to make me one of his fuck em and lose em girls, Cass! It makes me sick to my stomach because I know if I ever actually let him have sex with me, he wouldn't care about what happens after the fact…" I said, my voice going from loud and slight angry to a mere mumble.

He sighed deeply, taking his lemon water into his hands. "I understand that, Adam but what I don't understand is why this whole thing upsets you so much? Of course he fucking wants you Adam. You're sexy as fuck and he has to live with your gorgeous ass in his dorm room every day. Of course he wants to pound into it. Anybody with a did could potentially want to fuck you," he said, being extremely blunt about it. My face turned scarlet and I looked down at my iced tea, concentrating very hard on one of the ice cubes. I loved Cassidy but sometimes… Some times he was almost too much to handle. Right now was one of those times. "Just because he wants to shove his dick into you doesn't mean he's going to. You have to say yes in order to have sex with him, so as long as you say no, you're golden."

"I realize that Cass," I said with an exasperated sigh. "But that's not the issue… The issue is that Tommy won't leave me alone. It's like… like he has to have me before he can move on to his next love victim. It's like he's got some stupid code that he has to stick to and once he sees something he wants, he has to have it before he can move on. He's not going to give up, Cass… That's my issue."

"So just keep saying no?" he asked, lifting his glass to his lips and sipping the lemon water.

I was silent for a minute or so, deciding to take a sip of my iced-tea to make it look like there was a reason for my silence. In reality, I was just thinking. "I know Cass but Tommy is… A really pretty boy and he wants me… I mean… what if I can't, you know, deny him forever and then he uses me? I know I'm saying that I can't stand him but he can be extremely charming when he tries. What if, in like a moment of weakness, I can't withstand that and we end up having sex or something and then he just leaves? Pretends like nothing ever happened?

A small smile cracked across Cassidy's lips. "Adam, I know Tommy's pretty and he's good at manipulating people to get them into bed with him but you aren't like all those girls. You're, one a boy and two, you're one of the smartest people I know. If I know you like I think I do, you aren't going to let that man whore through your barriers. You're strong and you're smart enough to realize that a one night stand will end up hurting you even more than just doing it. You'll be fine, I know you will be." Cassidy was reassuring but I wasn't really sure I was convinced.

"But Cass… what if I can't be on guard twenty-four seven. I mean… if I falter, I might end up in bed with him between my thighs and what then? If I fall enough to actually sleep with him, I might have real feelings for him and when he throws me away I'm going to hurting in too many ways. Then I'd have to live with him every day until school was over, remembering that one night we shared together and how he just… threw me away once he got what he wanted from me…" I said, my eyes fixated on my iced tea. I don't know this was suddenly pouring out of me. Until now, none of this had even occurred to me, but what if I was actually worried about all of this…? Did that mean I already kind of cared about Tommy? No, absolutely not. I do not have any sort of feelings for Tommy. He's just too disgusting.

Cassidy reached across the table, putting a hand over mine and giving it a reassuring squeeze. "Adam, I know you. I know that you would never have sex with anyone if you didn't truly want to. You don't have anything to worry about. Eventually he'll get tired chasing someone who isn't interested. The rejection will eat at him eventually and he'll stop," he said, lacing our fingers together (shut up, we're just close friends you bitches).

"What if the feel of rejection just makes him that much more determined to get what he wants from me?" I asked. Of course I always have to think of shit like that. Why do I always live in the "what if"s?

"Well, if that's the case, I can always come beat the shit out of him for you. Threaten to cut his dick off if he doesn't leave you the fuck alone," he said but I knew he was completely serious. It was funny though, so I chuckled, giving his hand another soft squeeze.

"Can always count on you, can't I?" I teased, smiling at the shorter man. "Do you really think this will all blow over though? He'll get over me and move on?" I asked, just wanting to hear him say it again to reassure me.

"Of course, Adam. Boys like Tommy need to have sex and when they don't have it, they move onto people who will give him what he wants. He doesn't have the patience to win someone like you over Adam. It'll be just fine, trust me," he said, that reassuring smile still on his face. I smiled back but I had to wonder if things really were going to blow over. That feeling in the pit of my stomach told me no, it wasn't going to just blow over…


	6. I Pretend That You Want Me

**Chapter Six: I pretend that you want me (and I fall asleep and dream of alternate realities)**

**Tommy's POV**

"Oh. My. God. _Really?_" I had to ask it. I had to. I had to make the exclamation and I had to ask because, while Brad was a fucking genius, I had to worry about him sometimes, too. Seriously. I held the costume in my hands, holding it out a little to really look at it. Short, black dress with white lace trim. The classic lacey apron, on the front. I could only assume that it would only reach my mid thigh, maybe come up a little higher depending on how I moved in it. On Brad's couch were a pair of fishnet tights and a white lace garter. Also, lying beside the fishnet was a small headband with two triangular shapes attached to them, made with faux fur color-match perfect to my hair.

Cat ears. And a tail, too. I can't forget that. The whole setup? Kitty maid.

Kinky.

My heart was hammering in my chest as I set the costume back down on the couch next to the fishnet, garter, ears and tail. There were even white, fingerless gloves that would come up to my elbows. Brad had this all perfectly planned. In fact, he was standing on the other side of the couch, arms crossed and wearing a shit-eating smirk on his face. He knew this was perfect. He knew it all along, and that's why he did it. He did it just to make this perfect in every possible way…

"Brad, you're a fucking genius…" Well, I had to voice my thoughts. Brad squealed, clapping his hands together before rushing around the couch towards me. He gathered up the costume, fishnet and garter in his hands, leaving the gloves next to the ears and tail before taking me by the hand and pulling me to his bedroom. He had the whole dorm to himself this semester, lucky asshole. I stumbled behind him as he threw me into his room and shutting the door. Not that it mattered, really. We were the only ones in the dorm.

"You can thank me later after you've gotten between Lambert's thighs. Right now, we need to get you dressed!" He said, reaching down and grabbing the hem of my hoodie and quickly tugging it up, trying to tear it from my frame. I laughed softly, raising my arms and feeling the fabric pulled away. He somehow managed to get my shirt in the process, and I stood half-naked in front of him. This wasn't really a problem. Brad's seen me naked. I've seen Brad naked. We've fucked around and we're still best friends. Not quite friends-with-benefits, per-say, but… Well, no, yeah.

I moved his hands aside, keeping them from my belt. Brad and I were close, but I could handle the undressing and redressing myself, kay thanks. I pulled my belt free before undoing the buttons and tugging down the fly. I kicked my jeans off, standing bare-butt naked in front of Brad. And, being Brad, he didn't even try hiding the fact that he was checking me out up and down. I rolled my eyes, punching him in the arm before taking the dress from him. I turned it around, unzipping the back of the dress before turning it again and stepping into it. I slid my arms through the sleeves, letting it hang on my shoulders as Brad zipped the back, and as I glanced down I noticed a slight problem…

"Hey, Brad?" I said, still staring. Brad hummed in response, finished with zipping and was smoothing the back of the dress. "What am I supposed to do to cover my dick?"

Brad snorted, shaking his head and going to his dresser. He pulled the top drawer out, rummaging through it before taking something into his hand and turning toward me, keeping it hidden behind his back. My heart pounded a little again, and I suddenly became very, very afraid of the solution that was waiting behind his frame. The smile on his face wasn't helping either, and the gleam in his eye just ensured me that I wasn't going to enjoy this, but at the same time I would. I looked down at the curve of his arm, waiting for him to reveal it, and when he moved, my heart stopped.

A black thong.

"Do you want to wear it under the fishnet or over?" He asked. My mouth dropped open and for a moment I forgot to breathe entirely. A black thong. A _black thong_? I blinked once before closing my jaw and inhaling deeply through my nose, placing my hands on my hips.

"Which would be better?" I asked him, raising an eyebrow and smirking just a touch. Brad grinned ear to fucking ear and tossed the thong to me. I caught it in both hands like it was the apple on the fucking Twilight cover. I stared down at the silky, elasticy fabric in my palms before looking back over at Brad, who had crossed the floor and was smiling sweetly, his hands resting gently on my hips.

"Over." He whispered, leaning forward and kissing me on the lips. A soft peck, really. But none the less, chills ran down my spine. He snatched up the fishnet tights from the bed, handing them to me and taking the thong from my grasp. I rolled my eyes, sighing softly before bending down slightly and began to pull them on. They felt… Rather nice, to say the least. They were oddly comfortable for being fucking fishnet. I pulled them up to my hips, smoothening and evening them out. I stood straight as Brad held the thong out to me.

"Oh, God… This had better fucking work, Brad, or so help me I'm going to maim you." I told him, taking the thong back again. I inhaled slowly, before bending back down again and stepping into it. I shimmied it up my legs and pulled it into place, readjusting it several times. The thong caught the fishnet and was shoving it up into my ass, and it felt super uncomfortable at first. But after a little bit of wiggling (and punching Brad in the arm again for laughing), it became tolerable.

"Sexy." Brad commented and I rolled my eyes, grabbing the garter and sliding it up my leg, letting it rest around my thigh. I felt like such a naughty boy, and I wasn't even done yet with getting ready. "Makeup and hair time." Brad said, and I nodded once, not fighting him as he pulled me to the bathroom.

Normally I would never let anyone else do my makeup, but Brad had a vision and I didn't want to ruin that for him. He sat me down on the toilet seat (the thong digging even father up) before rummaging through his makeup bags and behind the mirror. He pulled out all sorts of things, some I recognized, some I didn't (which is a feat in and of itself). He took a small white sponge and dabbed some foundation onto it, smoothing it over my skin and balancing my skin tone. He grabbed a small brush and a container of blush, fanning what felt like a cake-ton on my cheeks, but his thumbs were gentle and smooth and evened them out. I was sure that it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was.

Blush aside, Brad grabbed the eyeliner and make quick, thin lines along my eyelids. Easy movements. We're gay men, it's in our blood. Eye shadow, lip gloss, and I'm even sure Brad drew on whiskers to my cheeks. Makeup done, Brad grabbed a tub of gel, unscrewing the lid and gathering some of the goop into his fingers. He tossed my hair around, spiking up the back but letting the front stay flat over my eyes. He smiled again, rising off of his hands before reaching up and grabbing a small container. He pulled the lid off, dumping some of whatever it was into his hand before setting the container down and rubbing his hands together. I felt something light falling onto my hair and on my clothes, and upon looking down, I noticed that he was sprinkling glitter onto me. Oh, jeez. He stepped back, smiling before letting me stand up and check my reflection in the mirror.

Dusky, shadowy blue and grey graced my eyelids and perfect pink blush. It looked natural— not makeup, but actual blood rushing up into my cheeks. The lip gloss shined, giving my lips a slightly dark stain. Hair done up and styled to perfection, and then covered in glitter. I looked like a fucking fairy. But I loved it. I smiled a little, turning and giving Brad a tight hug. I looked fucking good. His arms went around my waist and he squeezed me gently, rubbing my back before sliding his hand down and grabbing my ass, squeezing it. I yelped a little, blushing and smiling.

"Perv." I commented and he rolled his eyes before pushing me out of the bathroom. We went back to the living room where I slid the arm socks onto my arms and slid the headband onto my head. I bent down, grabbing the three inch stripper black heels that I would be wearing, strapping them onto my feet. At least I had some practice in these, otherwise I'd be tripping all night. Brad adjusting the headband slightly so that the ears were perfectly centered. I smiled to myself as he pinned the tail to the back of my dress, smoothening everything again. I turned towards him and saw that he was grinning ear to ear, his face a little red.

"You're fucking hot, Tommy Joe. Just saying." He said. I rolled my eyes, my hand curling around the back of his neck and I pulled him forward, kissing him hard. My tongue slid between his teeth, grazing along his and pressing to his cheek before I pulled away, smiling.

"Thanks, Brad. I couldn't have done this without you…" I told him. He smacked me on the ass before pushing me to the door. He still had to get ready, and he told people that he would be coming late. Every Halloween, the dorms had parties on each floor. You could choose which one or ones you wanted to go to, but since a good number of people came to my floor, I usually stayed at home-base, so to speak. I opened the door and stepped out, walking down the hallway. I could hear music pounding from a room at the end of the hall, and I had to keep myself calm. Everything would be fine.

But what if Adam didn't show up?

Nonsense. He had to…

I neared the slightly ajar door, before inhaling slowly and pushing it open. The room was large, open and expansive; couches pushed against the walls and draped with black and orange covers. Balloons clung to the ceiling and there was a bar in the corner. The floor was hardwood, pounding with music and people were laughing and dancing and mingling. Costumes of all colors, shapes, sizes and ideas. People I knew, people I didn't. Eyes seemed to shift towards me the second I passed the door way, and I swear that, with the exception of the music, the whole room was silent.

Sure, I was sexy as fuck on a daily basis, but this was a kind of pretty that people weren't used to… I smiled a little, blushing beneath the rouge on my cheeks and I fanned my eye lashes a little, keeping my hands at my sides as my heels clicked on the floors. I scanned the eyes of everyone, before falling on those that were wide and bluer than the fucking ocean itself. My lips curved into a smile and I reached up, my fingertips touching the ends of the back of my hair, as if I was being shy and modest. Most everyone had looked away. And I say most because there was at least one who wasn't.

Adam.


	7. He Won't Stop Till He Hits Dat Hoe!

**Chapter Seven: Bitches I Hope You Know, He Won't Stop Till He Hits Dat Hoe!  
Adam's POV**

So far, the party was lame. Girls in skanky outfits were shaking their titties in my face and I don't think any of them realized I'm gay or maybe they're just… Hoping that I'm not. When I rejected them, they went to Cassidy, who also rejected them. Come on, if a cute boy is hanging out with another cute boy and one of them is gay, obviously the other one is gay too.

Cassidy and I didn't really dress up. We, more or less, covered ourselves in glitter and called that our costumes. So far things were dull and I wanted to leave. I'd rather be drinking coffee in a poetry club if you really want to know the truth about it.

We were sitting by the window in the back of the room, both of us with fruit drinks in our hands, but the people planning the party were just too damned cheap to spring for nice classes or even the plastic ones that look like find china. No, these were red, plastic cups with 29 cent umbrellas in them. "Cass, this is so lame, can we please just go?" I asked him, practically whining like a little kid who wanted some cool looking toy at a store. I didn't care if I sounded like a little kid. I wanted to leave. I didn't really like the crowd that was here anyway…

"Oh lighten up and learn to have a little fun every once in a while," Cassidy teased, sipping at the contents of his red cup. "I'm sure once we've had a few, the party will seem a lot more attractive and who knows, maybe you'll meet a nice boy." Cassidy was obviously in a very sarcastic mood today because I haven't been interested in another boy since I split things off with Drake to come to college… "And besides, you need to, you know, take a break from all the shit you've got going on in your life with all your-" Cassidy's words cut off as everyone gasped at something.

All the people who went to this school (aside from Cassidy and myself) were complete morons.

Our attention went to where everyone was staring. Apparently someone had just come to the party and was dressed like a skank. God figure, it's Halloween. Girls take that as an excuse to put on something really slutty and add some sort of cute ears and a tail to it or something. Probably just another girl with giant breasts wanting to get Tommy to sleep with her. That was my best guess and boy was I dead wrong.

My eyes fell on a cute blond with perfect, dusky make-up, a skimpy (and extremely tight) maid's outfit, fishnet leggings with an obvious thong underneath and cute pumps. To top it all off? Cat ears and a tail that matched the color of _his_ hair. Cute, very cute. No matter how much I wanted to look away like everyone else had, I couldn't take my eyes off of Tommy. He was completely gorgeous and if I actually was drunk, I probably would have hopped right into bed with the little fucking tease…

"Holy fucking shit…" Cassidy mumbled, looking away from Tommy the KittyCat and over at me. "Look away, Adam, just look away. Pretend he isn't standing there looking sexy as fuck… You're stronger than that!" he said. Yeah, Cass, thank you so fucking much for the reassurance. You make me feel so fucking strong! "I'm totally here for you, A-" He didn't even get my full name out. Another boy walked through the door, also dressed like a slut. He wore skin tight, red leather boots that went all the way up to his mid thighs and black hoes underneath (again with a visible thong). He wore a baggy dress shirt with a messed up tie and a glittery top hat. I never understood why the whole baggy shirt thing made people look sexy, but they did and that kid looked sexy at fuck. If I remembered right, his name was Brad or something and I think he's a friend of Tommy's.

By no means did he outshine Tommy, but he was sexy enough to get Cassidy drooling. "Cass?"

"I'll be right back, Adam…" he muttered, sliding off of his seat and walking over to Brad. Oh my fucking God, Cassidy seriously? You are really going to fucking leave me to fend TommyCat off by my fucking self? What kind of friend are you anyway? Ugh!

Before I even looked back at Tommy, he was right next to me, rubbing against me like a real cat might do. "Hey Adam," he said, trying to look cute, flustered and embarrassed, which he pulled off quite nicely. Fuck… Something twitched beneath the zipper of my extremely tight skinny jeans (the color of burnt orange). "Enjoying the party?" he asked, doing that cute thing where you twirl the back of your hair with your fingers to look all innocent.

Right, like Tommy Joe Ratliff could ever be fucking innocent.

"Um… yeah…" I mumbled, trying not to look as hot and bothered as I was feeling. I had a sudden desire to fan myself, but I didn't. He smiled at me, a perfect, pearly smile. One that actually did look innocent. Another twitch under my zipper. Fuck my life…

"Really? Then why aren't you mingling? You're friend sure is," he said, glancing back at Brad and Cassidy, who were no longer talking but were using their tongues quite passionately. Tommy, I was sure, wanted me to do the same with him because that would lead to him pushing me onto his mattress and pulling my jeans down… The image that was growing behind my lids was a pleasurable one. In fact, I'd never had someone fuck me before but from the reactions I got from both Hiei and Drake, it was definitely something that you should experience someday. Part of me desperately wanted that and Tommy was… the best of the best right?

Uh no, wrong.

"I'm just…" I tried to clear the vision from my brain, but the harder I tried, the more in depth the scene got and suddenly Tommy was laying between my thighs and he was- Ah… I whimpered quietly, my now completely erect member pressing to the inside of my jeans. I prayed nobody would notice, but come on, what were the odds of that? At least one person would notice, and when he smiled, pressing into it at just the right angle, I was sure he noticed the minute I'd gotten hard.

"Wanna have a little fun tonight, Adam?" he asked me, pressing into my erection again. I whimpered, wanting to pull away and yet wanting more of the friction Tommy was creating. I didn't want to have fun with Tommy because fun with Tommy eventually meant having my ass sore and my heart thrown out a twenty story window… But, as a young male, I had a little bit of a tendency to think with the wrong brain sometimes. I hoped right now would not be one of those times.

I shook my head, trying to pull away from him. "Excuse me… I really need to go to the bathroom…" I muttered, trying to step around him, but he only rubbed up against me again, sliding his basically exposed ass right over my hard on. Damn you Tommy… Damn you!

"I don't think so… Want a little bit of help with that?" he asked, his fingers running up my inner thigh and right up my erection. I gasped, thrusting my hips into his hand for a brief second before pulling back.

"No, Tommy, I don't want your help with it. I don't want your help and I am not-" That's when he leaned up, kissing my neck, gently at first but then he began to bite and suck at the soft skin. I moaned, arching into Tommy for a minute. Then I realized who was sucking on my neck and I pulled back, making a few inches between us. Tommy frowned a little, taking another step towards me just to rub up against my aching dick.

"Come on, Adam, why not?" he asked, practically purring into my ear. Fuck, how was he so catlike? Like I have room to talk, I suppose, with all my whimpering like a puppy. "You know you want to and you know I want to, so why not?" He smiled another award winning smile at me.

I finally put my hands out, pushing him away from me just slight. He didn't like that at all, but I didn't care. "Tommy, I… I'm not having sex with you," I stated firmly. He frowned again, taking yet another step towards me.

"Come on, Adam! I've done everything I can think of for you! Why don't you want me?" he asked, looking extremely unhappy, and for a minute, I felt back for telling him no… But then I saw a group of three girls. Each I recognized because Tommy had slept with all of them and they glanced in our direction, looking sad.

Frowning, I looked back down into Tommy's chocolate eyes. "That's why, Tommy," I said, pointing at the small group of girls. A sadness touched my own eyes. "I don't want to end up like those girls. I don't want to have sex and then be tossed aside because you got what you wanted from me. I'm not a play thing, I'm a human being… mostly," I said. My penis was still throbbing but not nearly as intensely as it had been before.

Tommy glanced over at the group he'd slept with and shook his head, putting a tiny smile on his face. He ran his hand up my arm seductively. "Adam, you aren't like them… This is different. I like you… I like you a lot," he whispered, leaning in and nipping the lobe of my ear. I whimpered again, leaning back away from Tommy's lips.

"No…" Part of me desperately wanted to believe Tommy really did love me and want me but… I so knew that wasn't true. "No, I'll just be anything fuck to add to your collection," I said quietly. He wasn't too pleased with my answer because he pulled back, crossing his arms over his chest and he pouted. God he was so fucking adorable…

"Adam, that isn't true! I'm not just going to throw you away! I like you! What part of that don't you understand?" he exclaimed. If the music wasn't so loud, people would have been staring at us, but because it was loud, I could hardly even hear him and he was only six inches away from my face!

"All of it. You've never cared about any of the girls you've slept with, so what the fuck makes me any different? If I sleep with you tonight, I'll wake up tomorrow lonely and miserable…" I said, starting off strong and finishing miserably weak.

Tommy actually looks like he was going to cry, but it was probably just acting. People who are good at manipulating other people into bed with them know how and when to play the sympathy card. "Adam… Adam please, I Just want to be with you. I want there to be an us," he said, but I knew he was lying. Boys like Tommy didn't just suddenly stop being a whore because they want to date someone for real. No. Tommy and I didn't know each other well enough to be in love. Ever since I told him I was gay, he was nice to me, trying to get into my pants.

"No, no you don't," I said, my own eyes watering. I'd never had someone try so desperately to manipulate me and I hated the feeling. A lot. I pushed passed Tommy (as well as a bunch of other people) and took off, wanting to get away from the party. I pulled out my cell phone, calling the only person I could think of since Cassidy had abandoned me. I called Drake praying he would pick up the phone.

On the fourth ring, he did. "Drake? Hey… It's Adam…" I said into the receiving end, the tears finally rolling down my cheeks.


	8. I'm Hearing What You're Saying

**Chapter Eight: ****I'm hearing what you're saying, but I just can't make a sound...**

**Tommy's POV**

"I want there to be an _us_…" I was pleading with Adam. I was doing everything I could to get him to give in. It was obvious when I walked in that he liked what I was wearing. It was obvious by the rather enormous bulge pressing into the back of his zipper. It was obvious when I pressed against it (and holy fuck, he's huge…) and when I kissed and bit at his neck he seemed so turned on. His moans were soft and I wondered if he was imagining me, pushing into him, moving in him…

But he was persistent. He was determined to keep pushing me away, as was evident when he actually flattened his hands on my chest and shoved me away from him. I could feel my eyes watering with false tears (thank you, Acting 101) as he shook his head and left with a soft "no" falling off of his lips. His own eyes were glistening with tears, but I imagined them to be real. Did he feel bad for turning me down?

Probably.

I watched him disappear through the crowds of people before walking out the door. If I saw correctly, he had his phone out and was holding it to his ear before he vanished from my line of sight. I don't know how long I spent, standing there feeling like an idiot. It… It was fool proof. The makeup… The hair-styling, the dress, the ears, the fishnet! All of it should have… It should have been enough, it should have done the trick! It should have ensured me getting a little some'some tonight. And yet…

"_Fuck!_" I shouted, clenching my hands into fists and quickly storming out of the party just as Adam had done. But, unlike him, I wasn't crying. I was angry. Probably more than I should have been, but I had the right to be angry, did I not? After everything I'd done. Everything I'd attempted… Failed. All of it, failed…

"God… Motherfucking… _damnit!_" I swore again, pushing past people and into the hallway, passing three doors before shoving open the one on the left. Mine and Adam's dorm. Part of me doubted he'd come back here after leaving, and that part of me turned out to be right. For after I took a brief glance around, I became quickly aware that Adam was, in fact, not here. See? Told you.

"Why does he have to be so _fucking stubborn?_" I hissed to myself, tearing the cat ears off of my head and throwing them onto my bed. I sighed angrily, reaching up and pulling on the back of the maid's dress, pulling it over my head. Sure, Brad had to zip it up to get it on me, but I didn't want to fight with it and I would probably never wear it again after this; so the slight strain of stitches and soft tear that I heard didn't really bother me. Besides, Brad could fix it later.

I tossed the dress aside, biting down on my bottom lip as I tore the fishnet and thong of, standing exposed for a few short moments in the dorm room. I snatched up a pair of sweats off of the floor beside my bed, pulling them up to my hips and letting them hang. I glanced around again before grabbing my Depeche Mode sweatshirt and pulling it on over my head. Sure, I was naked beneath this layer of clothing, but I didn't give a damn. I needed to get out of the fucking dorm before I killed something.

Why couldn't Adam just… Give in? I sighed again, walking into the bathroom to clean off my face. I didn't have much of an interest in getting jumped and raped because my face looked pretty… I grabbed a washcloth and got it wet with hot water, wiping my face clean. I didn't know what I'd been doing wrong… I played up the appeal, I did things for him, I was sweet and nice and compassionate and I backed off when he asked, so why couldn't he return one little favor?

Fucker.

Cleaning my face, I set the washcloth down on the edge of the sink, shutting off the water and turning to leave. I needed to get out. I needed to get out of this fucking place. I couldn't explain why I was in such a rage, but something in me was just saying that I needed to leave. I guess it was humiliation from Adam's rejection. Or maybe it was being abandoned by Cheeks in my time of need for some tall brunette… What was his name again? Charlie? Casey? Cass— Cassidy.

I sat down on my bed, pulling a pair of socks onto my feet before shoving them into a pair of tennis shoes. I normally wouldn't have been caught dead wearing such unsavory clothing out in public, but it was almost midnight on a Saturday night and everyone else would be at various parties and getting drunk. They wouldn't notice me, anyway. Which was just fine…

I stood up again, grabbing my phone off of my bed and shoving it into the pocket of my sweatpants before opening the dorm door and stepping out, shutting it behind me. I glanced to my right, seeing the slightly open door of the party before turning left and walking down the hallway at a relatively fast pace. My heart was beginning to pound a little harder as I neared the door to the stairwell. I pulled the door open, starting to head downstairs when a voice caught my attention and made me stop—

"I don't know what his fucking problem is, Drake! It's… It's just… He's so fucking disgusting! I mean, he was rubbing into me and feeling me up and just trying to push me to the limit where I couldn't say no… I know that Drake, but— no, you don't…" Adam sighed and I stopped, frowning and leaning against the door, closing it as silently as I could. I glanced around seeing his shadow on the wall on the stairwell above me. He sounded like he was crying…

"Drake… He's… Yeah, he's a good looking guy, but he's not like you or Hiei… He doesn't have a fucking heart. He doesn't feel love. He just fucks and leaves and doesn't feel any regret." I blinked, staring blankly down at the floor and feeling my heart pounding against my chest like a hammer to a nail. No regret? No heart? No love? That wasn't true—! I… I felt love.

"No, Drake… I don't ever see myself being with someone like him… He's… He's a prick. A sex-crazed, low life prick who's going to end up working as a prostitute in one of those gay-only clubs. That or in prison." Wow, prison? What the fuck, Adam?

I stayed by the door, listening as Adam continued to cry softly into his phone. I could see his shadow trembling with sobs, and… I felt bad… But why should I've felt bad? But then again— why was he the one crying? Fuck…

"I just… I don't want to do this anymore… I don't want to be here… I know, I know, I'm supposed to be pursuing my dream, but I just… I can't take it anymore, Drake. I can't stand being around him because all he thinks about is getting my pants off and shoving himself into me just so he can have the satisfaction that he screwed his roommate just like he screwed everyone else on this fucking campus." I blinked once, breathing deeply and trying to stay quiet… But I wanted to run away.

"He's just… He's disgusting and he's a freak… Well… I know not like me—" like Adam? How was he a freak? How was I a freak? "I don't know what to do… I know I should at least finish out this year, but then I think I'm coming home… I'll… I'll suffer through being his roommate or I'll get a new dorm, but after this year, I'm done…" I pushed off from the door, quickly trotting down the stairwell, uncaring of the noise I was potentially making. I was uncaring if Adam happened to look over the railing to find me running away… I didn't care.

When I reached the bottom, I ripped the door open and started sprinting. Sprinting past drunk hoards of people laughing and singing and acting like assholes. Sprinting past teachers and adults and rooms crowded with food and drink and decorations and games. Sprinting past everything because I think, if I were to stop at all, I would make a fool of myself more than I already was. I mean, come on, sprinting through campus in the middle of the night? Pretty foolish.

People shouted at me to stop or to join them, but I ignored them. I ignored it all because I couldn't take it. But why? Why was I running? Was it because of what I'd heard Adam say? Was it because of what happened at the party? _Why was I fucking running away?_

I didn't even realize that I was outside and still running (or the fact that it was raining) until my foot caught a divot or something in the ground and I went flying forward, skidding a few feet on wet pavement on my hands and knees. I hissed, swearing aloud as the burning in my hands and legs erupted. I clenched my jaw to hold back a scream of frustration and pain as my hands curled into fists.

I was such a fucking idiot… I knew that Adam wasn't like the other girls, I knew that he was different… But I didn't take into consideration that he… He had more depth. He had more soul than the girls I'd seen before… I bit down on my bottom lip before pushing myself to my feet. My knees and palms were throbbing and stinging like bitches, but it really could have been worse.

I sighed softly, glancing over my shoulder back towards campus. I couldn't go back tonight. I didn't want to face Adam after what had happened and what I'd heard. I figured he probably didn't want to see or speak to me either, so why bother? Maybe Brad would let me crash at his place. If it didn't take that boytoy he picked up at the dance to his dorm… It wouldn't surprise me in the least.

No, I couldn't go to Brad's. But, who then? None of the girls, no. Bad idea. Didn't really have a whole lot of friends aside from Brad. Everyone just knew me because of the things I'd done and how I looked and blah-blah-blah…

I felt pathetic. Emo. Ridiculous. In pain. I'd never felt like this. Humiliated. Foolish. An asshole. A prick. How many words and emotions could I say until I completed felt like shit about myself? I wasn't sure, and I didn't really want to find out, so I started walking again. The rain had soaked through my clothes and made them stick to my frame. I was shivering with cold and I suddenly didn't care whether or not I got sick from this. I probably deserved it, anyway.

'_So, what? You want to jump into his pants and fuck the daylights out of him and now you're running away in the cold and rain and feeling like an ass? Thomas Joe Ratliff, you are a bipolar son of a bitch_.'


	9. Time Flies, Time Dies, Glory

**Chapter Nine: Time Flies, Time Dies, Glory…  
Adam's POV**

Exam week started on Monday. It'd mid December and after exams are over, all the students on campus will be going home for the holidays. I'm not really religious or one for the holiday spirit, but it was going to be great seeing my friends and family at home… Seeing Drake at home…

The last month and a half had been the most awkward phase of my life (next to sitting through high school health class and learning about vaginas, that is). Tommy and I acted as if we didn't live together. No words were said between us and we almost never even looked at each other. He stayed on his side of the curtain and I stayed on mine. What I didn't quite understand was that Tommy hadn't started bringing girls over again. He always seemed to be here but he was always alone. Occasionally Brad, Tommy's best friend and Cassidy's new boyfriend, was here, but other than that he didn't see anybody. I figured he would have started up with his one night stands again after my rejections.

He didn't.

Tommy, more or less, just sat around the dorm attempting to do homework while listening to what I could only assume to be Marilyn Manson (I didn't know! I didn't listen to fucked up music like he did!)

Life was quiet and I was completely and totally fine with that. The only thing that bothered me was this sad look Tommy always had shining in his eyes. We didn't make eye contact often, but sometimes it was inevitable and when we did look into each other's eyes, just for a quick second, I always saw what I kind of thought was… agony?

Whatever. What did I care? Tommy deserved it right? I mean, he used all those girls just so he could get off for an hour or two. He even tried to use me for said pleasures! He deserved to be miserable because he was always such a douche. So… why did I always feel just a little bit back when I saw that look in his big, brown eyes? Maybe because I knew part of it (is not all of it) was because of my rejecting him. But he deserved my rejection so I shouldn't feel bad!

And honestly, I don't really… Well kind of, but not really.

I'd arranged to finish all my exams the first three days of finals week so I could catch an early flight home. I didn't want to be stuck in an airport full of a thousand girls on campus who had been fucked by Tommy Joe Ratliff and a thousand boys who wanted to kill Tommy for sleeping with their girlfriends. I just wanted to go home to my family and Drake as soon as I could because I really just couldn't fucking handle this college anymore.

My flight was about three hours, which wasn't bad at all and I slept most of the way there. When I exited the plane, the first person I saw was my younger brother, Neil, just because he happened to be tallish. My mother and father were with him as well as Drake!

I sprinted over to them (hey, I'm in good shape so shut the fuck up) and hugged them all in turn, ending with Drake, who blushed wildly. He hugged me back and our lips met in a gentle kiss. Fuck did I miss that kiss… My mother smiled happily at us and snapped a picture. "We've all missed you so much, Adam," she said, coming over to us and planting a kiss on my cheek. Rah, I was a grown man and I was still getting kisses from my mother. What the fucking hell?

"I missed you guys too, but could you please not kiss me like that anymore? I'm twenty years old, Mom…" I muttered, a light blush, I was sure, was dancing across my cheeks. She just rolled her eyes and smiled.

"I suppose I'll be leaving the kissing part to Drake. He's missed you a lot, you know," she said and Drake, again, blushed wildly. God damn he was so cute… He was as pretty as Tommy but he actually gave a damned about other people's feelings and wasn't just in a 'relationship' for the sexual bonuses, though our sexual bonuses were rather… nice… "Adam, why don't you and Drake go out for a little while? We'll take your stuff home and get dinner started, alright?" my mother asked me and I just nodded, smiling at her.

"Alright mom, sounds great," I said. My father patted me on the shoulder, smiling softly and Neil just nodded at me. He was never really one for words, but I took the nod as a gesture of our brotherhood and I smiled back at him.

Drake took my hand in his smaller one and he pulled me out of the airport. Our airport was rather small, because we lived in a tiny community, so it wasn't hard to maneuver out of it. Drake hailed a yellow taxi and climbed into the back of it, giving the driver directions to a place we had spent a lot of time in our friendship and throughout our relationship. We'd even had sex there once, in the middle of the night… We didn't mean for it to happen, it just did.

The cab pulled up to a small park. Today was a beautiful day. It was chilly but not freezing, so we could be outside for a while without having to worry too much about getting sick. "Come on," Drake mumbled to me as he climbed out of the car. I followed, my eyes transfixed on him. He was still so beautiful… I couldn't believe he didn't have a boyfriend right now. He was so wonderful, so perfect… Any guy would be lucky to have him.

Drake took my hand, leading me over to a large tree, the very same one we'd made love under that night… He sat down, patting the grass next to him and I took the hint, sitting next to him, close enough to actually be cuddling. He leaned into me, seeming to enjoy the contact for a while. I imagined he hadn't had anyone cuddle with him since the last time I was home… and I felt bad…

"Drake, why don't you have a boyfriend? Why don't you date anymore?" I asked quietly, running my fingers through his short hair.

A smile pulled at his lips. "Because I haven't found anyone who meets my standards. Not after you. Nobody's beautiful enough or talented enough or… freakish enough," he said, his smile turning into a smirk near the end. I chuckled quietly, knowing exactly what he was referring to.

"Drake, I only thought it would be best for us to break up because I didn't want you to have to sit around waiting for me to come back…" I said. "If I'd known you would have just sat around anyway, I never would have broken things off between us." Drake gave me a tired, happy smile and he rested his head against my shoulder.

"Adam, I don't think we should get back together right now… For the next month we have off for break we can be a cutesy couple again, fine whatever, but when you go back to college, I want you to have the freedom to be with whoever you want to be with. It wasn't you dumping me. It was a mutual agreement to split up for the time being," he said quietly, one of his hands falling around my thigh.

"But Drake, I don't want to be with anyone else… I want you…" I protested.

Another lazy smile spread across his face. "Of course you do. We love each other, but we aren't practical for each other anymore. You need someone who can always be there for you and I obviously can't be when you're so far away," he said and I, once again, frowned.

"Drake… I told you, after this year I'm done. I'm not going back," I said.

This pulled a reaction out of Drake that I never expected. He sat up and gave me this look that told me I was being a moron. "What?"

"Adam, you need to stay in that school. It's amazing that you got in and that you've been working so hard to follow your dreams. You have a real chance to make something amazing out of yourself and I am _not_ going to let you throw all of your hard work and all of the future opportunities you have right now, for me. I'm not worth it," he said, sounding as if there would be no more discussion after that because he was determined to be right.

I hated the way he said he wasn't worth that price. Wasn't love always worth that price? Of course it was! What was a person without love? "But Drake…"

"Adam, please understand that I'm only saying this because I love you. I love you so much and I want you to take full advantage of all the resources you have to make yourself something great. You've got a real shot to be whatever you want to be. You could change the world! You shouldn't give all that up just so you can stay in this tiny ass town with me." He stopped for a minute, looking down at the grass we'd made love on only a year prior. "I couldn't afford to go away with you like I wanted, but in two years, when I graduate from the community college, I'm getting the fuck out of this place. I want to move on to bigger and better things once I have that degree. You should want the same thing. Please do not throw that all away…" Drake looked back at me with big, brown eyes that were shining with what could only be tears and determination. "We'll see each other on break all the time and if you still want to be with me once we've both graduated from college, then we'll move on to bigger and better things together."

"What do you mean if?" I asked, frowning slightly.

Drake tilted his head back and he laughed out loud. "Adam, I'm not the first person you fell in love with. I really doubt I'll be the last. In two years you might have a magnificent boyfriend who can do some many more things for you than what I can. I'm not going to hold you to a teenager's promise when I know I may not be the best person for you," he said. A bit of pain flashed across his face but honesty was radiating from him. "I don't think I'll be able to give you everything you need forever, no matter how much I want to. You'll need someone who can. If, in two years, you still think that's me then great, we'll run off and get hitched, but if you find a great guy, then I'll be just as happy for you."

Our hands meshed together, fingers lacing through one another and as I stared down at him, I couldn't imagine being with anyone else, but when he looked up at me with those big brown eyes, I didn't see him for a minute…

_I saw Tommy…_


	10. Giving Up Inside

**Chapter Ten: I know in darkness I will find you giving up inside like me**

**Tommy's POV**

I haven't spoken to him since the Halloween party.

A month and a half of not talking to him, barely _looking _at him. I just… I couldn't. Not after hearing the things he was saying about me in that stairwell. Not after really considering just how much of a whore I was. I couldn't do it. I couldn't look at him with all of that knowledge pounding against the edges of my brain because I knew that if I did I wouldn't be able to hold it all in. There were so many mixed emotions going around in my head, and they were all pointing at me—

Anger; anger at myself. Why did I have to be such a whore all the time? Why did I break people's hearts? Why did I fuck and leave every single time and showed no remorse for it at all? Why this? Why that? I was angry at myself, though I was careful not to let it show in front of Adam or Brad… Or anyone, for that matter. But there were days where I got so angry I felt sick to my stomach. I didn't cut or starve myself, I'm not that dumb, but I was emotionally beating myself up. And, sometimes, that's just as bad.

Regret; regret for the things I'd done to everyone. To all the girls whose ears I whispered sweet nothings into and then kicked out the next morning just so I could repeat the process with her best friend. To Isaac, whom I don't speak to at this point because of our drunk fucking. To Adam… Adam, who just wanted to have a good time at college and make friends and make the most out of everything. If I'd had my way, he wouldn't want any of this anymore…

Adam had already left for the holidays to go spend time with his family. And, as with the previous two months or so, he didn't say a word to me as he left. He just grabbed his things and walked out the door. I wasn't leaving until later tonight, but there were some things that I needed to take care of. Assignments to turn in real quick, a couple bags to pack, and… Something else that I needed to do.

Fear; what if Adam was true to his word? What if he didn't come back after this year? I was paid for (by my parents) to attend here for another two years after this. And… Despite all the things I'd done and the people I hurt, I couldn't imagine being here for another two years without Adam. I don't know why, but I just couldn't picture it clearly. It didn't look right without him there—

What am I even saying? It wouldn't be the same without Adam? Goddamnit… I sighed softly, gathering my assignments into a neat stack before setting them aside on my bed. My computer was packed and my clothes were all folded on the edge of my bed, waiting to be shoved into a duffel bag. Part of me really didn't want to go. I mean, don't get me wrong, I wanted to see my family, but I wasn't really looking forward to spending a week or whatever with them. Last I'd heard, my parents had invited my grandparents to come stay with us, and… I didn't really get along with my grandparents. Especially on my mom's side…

Whatever. I knew I had to go and visit them, anyway. I'd already said I would. As much as I wanted to stay here, I knew that it wouldn't be a good idea. All by myself in mine and Adam's dorm room? Yeah, not a healthy environment right now. I bit down on my bottom lip as I dug under my bed, pulling out a large, green duffel bag and tossing it up onto my bed. I sat back on my knees, just staring at the piles on my bed for a moment before standing up and cramming everything into the bag. I wasn't taking much— just a couple of shirts, pairs of jeans, socks, my computer, my iPod and my cell phone. Teachers were nice enough not to give us homework while we all went on vacation, but I was still trying to turn in late work from weeks ago. It's a wonder that they still let me turn shit in at this time…

I zipped up my bag before glancing around for my striped hoodie and my boots. They were tucked into a corner by the curtain that separated mine and Adam's beds… I let out a breath, walking over to them and snatching my hoodie up, tugging it on over my thin frame. I shoved my feet into my boots, zipping them up before glancing around one more time. Anything else that I was forgetting? Oh, wait…

I trudged back to my bed, sitting down on the edge and reaching under my pillow, grabbing a small notebook and a wide, long black box. I trailed my fingers over the rough ends before setting it back down and plucking a pen from the floor of my side of the room. I flipped the notebook open to a blank page, setting it down on my knees before I scrawled out two words in the neatest handwriting that I could manage: _Dear Adam_…

But I stopped, biting down on my lip. What was I going to say? Sorry for being a douche? Sorry for bringing all those girls over and then wanting to screw your brains out? Sorry for this? Sorry for that? I sighed, running fingers through my hair with my free hand. I knew I needed to apologize, and it would probably have been better in person, but Adam kind of wasn't here for that to be possible. And I didn't have his number. Fuck my life.

I just… I needed to be honest. That's what I needed to do. I needed to tell him that I was sorry and that I hoped he wouldn't leave— but then he'd know that I overheard him talking on the phone, and that was the last thing that… No. I needed to tell him that, too. I needed to be completely honest— regarding my regrets, my feelings, the things I knew and the fact that I wanted to change and be better…

I didn't realize I was beginning to cry until I blinked and saw several drops splattered across the paper. I had half a mind to tear out the page and start again, but maybe… Maybe he'd take this seriously if he saw that there had been emotion, literally, spilled onto paper. I sigh, rubbing my eyes before setting the pen down, waiting to write. But the words weren't coming to me. I groaned, looking over at Adam's side of the room. I licked my lips before glancing down at the paper again, pressing the pen to the page and writing…

As I wrote, more tears fell from my eyes and I felt like my heart was going to burst at it's already fraying seams. I choked on sobs occasionally as words seemed to pull themselves from my heart… I couldn't understand it, though. Why, after a few months, did one man change who I was, completely? Why was it Adam who made me see that what I'd done was wrong and that I needed to be better?

Why Adam?

I was barely aware that the letter was finished in words, but it didn't feel finished to me. I inhaled slowly, debating for a moment before writing three last words down, signing my name after them. I hoped this would be enough. I had to hope because that was my only option at this point. If Adam didn't accept the apologies (which part of me wouldn't be surprised by it) and didn't… Accept everything else, then… I don't know. I didn't think that far, but I figured if Adam came back and saw this and didn't want it, then I'd go find a new dorm and just… try to forget he even existed.

I opened the lid to the box, which revealed an almost perfect replica of Adam's favorite novel, _Wicked_. In truth, it was a gift box that just looked like a book. It was hollowed out in the center, but opened like a book; complete with fake pages. I tucked the note into the center before reaching under my pillow again, pulling out a long, thin box. I opened the lid, before pulling out the necklace that was tucked away inside on top of strips of cotton. It was a silver necklace with a heart pendant, tilted on its side, about the side of a quarter, and a music note engraved into the face. I smiled softly, before shoving the cotton into the book and placing the necklace on top, just next to the note.

I closed the book, pushing the lid back over the box that it sat in before standing from the edge of the bed and crossing to Adam's side of the room. I wanted it to be in a place that he would see, immediately, so I placed it, gently, on top of his pillow. I stood up straight, but I lingered on his side. It smelled like Adam; kind of cinnamony and heavy. It was appealing and I smiled softly before pulling myself away.

I grabbed my bag and threw it over my shoulder, snatching the stack of assignments before leaving my dorm. I had to drop them off to various teachers and then make my way to the airport. Brad had offered to give me a ride, but I told him I'd be fine with taking buses. The thing was, I didn't really feel like talking to him about any of this. Ever since Halloween, he's been caught up with his boy, Cassidy (who, I later learned, was a close friend of Adam's) and I just… Didn't want to deal with them.

I walked around campus, dropping off my late work into the small Inboxes of my teacher's classrooms before walking out and down the street, headed for the bus stop. It was chilly for December, but this was California, so it wasn't terrible. Besides, I was used to it. Sure, I lived in Burbank, but I'd vacationed in other places like Ohio, Oregon and even New York once, and those places got cold.

I'd been hoping that my letter for Adam would relieve some of the pressure on my chest, but it didn't really. If anything, I believe it made it worse. Because now it was just sitting there, waiting to be read and wouldn't be read for several more days. And I had to deal with the weight of not knowing Adam's reaction for a while and I just… I wasn't sure I'd be able to wait… Fuck… But of the entire letter, those last three words left the biggest ache in my heart.

I'd admitted that I loved him… And even if he didn't accept the apologies or anything, what if he didn't accept my love? What if he didn't believe it? Tears stung in my eyes again and I tried to shake the negative thoughts from my head but it didn't seem to do me any good. It just made my worry stronger.


	11. I Blew The Candle Out

So! This is the chapter... Truly, that set up the whole basis of the fic. Remember how the summary says that Adam's got an interesting secret? And he's been commenting on how's he not exactly _normal_? Yeah... Just read. :3

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Chapter Eleven: I Should Tell, I Blew The Candle Out Just To Get Back In  
Adam's POV**

In my opinion, winter break was far too short. Just when Drake and I had _really_ reconnected, even after his whole speech about me going back to college and blah, blah, blah, I had to leave him. It was hard enough the first time. Now was even worse because I knew Drake expected me to be in a relationship with someone else next time we saw each other.

I would always love him… even if someone else did steal my heart away from him, I would always love him. Just like Hiei… If you ever truly love, that person is always apart of you, even if they aren't the one you are truly with.

Unlocking and pushing open my dorm room, I half expected Tommy to be sitting on his bed with that dead look in his once so alluring eyes, but he wasn't. Maybe he wasn't back yet? Classes didn't actually start until the day after tomorrow, so he still had a little bit of time to get here. Whatever.

I tossed my duffle bag of clothes, toiletries and a little bit of make-up onto the floor next to my bed and set my laptop bag down a little more gently on the mattress. I wasn't until then that I saw the beautiful box lying against my pillow. A gift.

That confused me. Who would have been able to get into my dorm? Cassidy had given me a gift already for the season and other than him, I didn't really have any extremely close friends around here. All my other gifts came from my friends back home, my family and Drake. So yes, it confused me a lot but I picked it up anyway, taking the lid off of the box (reusable, best kind of wrapping anybody could ever do).

What I saw amazed me a little. A beautifully painted false book. One that looked identical to my worn copy of Wicked, only this didn't look anywhere near as old as my real book. I knew it wasn't actually a book. I'd seen book-boxes like these before but I never saw one done in Wicked and I was already in love with the gift…

When I opened the box, I sat down on the familiar mattress and pulled out the note and necklace tucked neatly into it. Without reading the note, I though Drake had somehow managed to get a gift delivered to my school and put in my dorm room because honestly, who else would give me a heart shaped necklace with a music note engraved into it. The piece was beautiful and a bright smile touched my lips.

Again I was confused when I opened the note up after setting the necklace aside. The handwriting looked nothing at all like Drake's pretty cursive. It was a decently nice print that I didn't recognize at all and as I read the note, I felt my heart aching a little. Aching because it wasn't Drake who had written the note or left the gift for me, but Tommy. Aching because the note was actually full of emotions I didn't know Tommy even possessed. Aching because, for the first time, I was moved by one of Tommy's gestures. Aching because, after everything I had just told Drake, my heart was lurching for someone else.

Aching because of three tiny little words: _I love you…_

Tommy admitted he loved me in this note, and after reading the entire thing over again, my heart started to melt. He'd never shown this kind of emotion before Halloween and after Halloween, when he stopped doing everything Tommy Joe Ratliff-like, I kind of just thought that my reject threw him off of his game. But part of me always thought that maybe he was acting so strange because I'd really hurt him… Maybe I just didn't realize that before because I didn't want to. I didn't want to know that I was the reason for Tommy's depression. That might have hurt me worse than the depression was hurting him!

I realized now that I really was the cause of it and my heart was breaking a little. I didn't ever believe Tommy was capable of love and at Halloween? I knew, for sure, that was not love but maybe… Well according to this note, after I shot him down, leaving him to burn, he realized that what he was doing with all those people was completely shameful and that he… wanted a chance to be with someone like me. Be someone like me.

Oh Tommy, you don't know the half of that wish…

As I read through the note a third time, I picked the necklace up off the pillow I'd laid it on and I unclasped it, looping it around my neck and reclasping it. I couldn't explain why this note was suddenly changing everything. I felt awful for it because I knew, even if he had told me to, that this would be hurting Drake so much and yet… Tommy was already hurting.

Damn it… why was life always so emotionally chaotic? I mean… why couldn't you just fall in love once and that was it? You met the person of your dreams, dated them, married them, had a family with them and died with them without having to worry about the interference of another person? Couldn't life just work that way?

No, of course it can't, Lambert, because that would be too fucking easy!

Tommy's necklace felt heavy against my heart as I read through the note for about the fifth time. I just… my mind could not comprehend all of it. I couldn't figure out why someone like Tommy would actually fall in love and want to change his ways for me. I mean, people like Tommy just didn't fall in love, right? Apparently not right.

The door clicked open and I jumped up a little, like a cat would when the vacuum cleaner was turned on. Tommy walked through the entry and threw his stuff down on the floor before his eyes met with mine. We stared at each other for a full sixty seconds before his eyes gazed down at the pendant hanging over my tank, right above my heart. "Hey," he said, the tiniest of smiles pulling the corners of his lips upward. "Whatchya reading?"

A blush swept across my face and for a few minutes, I started down at the note (without reading it), unable to speak. "Huh?" he asked after a few minutes of silence. My face only grew hotter.

"Your…." I licked my lips, my mouth feeling uncomfortably dry. "Your note…" I said quietly, looking back up at him. He seemed to look a little worried and I frowned.

"O-oh…" he said, wrapping his arms around his midsection and looking away from me. It was my turn to frown and I stood up, setting the note down and crossing over to Tommy.

"Do you mean it?" I asked, sounding hopeful and probably a little bit afraid. If I ever found out Tommy was lying about everything he said in that note, I wouldn't even finish the year. I would go home and go to community college with Drake and never come back to this Hell again.

A light pink color crossed Tommy's cheeks and he looked back up at me, his chocolate eyes sparkling with the allure they used to have before I said no. "Yes… every word," he said quietly, clearly embarrassed and probably a little bit… fearful of what I would say to him.

"Then where did that panty snatching boy go?" I asked, my eyes growing a little wide.

Tommy's blush darkened just a little. "He… got his act together and figured out his priorities…" he said quietly, his arms tightening a little around himself. He looked a little insecure and it was… cute. Oh great, now that he wrote me some mushy love note I was falling head over heels for the guy. Just fucking perfect.

"What changed?" I asked and Tommy merely shrugged, sitting down on his bed and crossing one leg over the other, resting his arms over his thighs. I walked over to his side of the curtain, looking down at him. "Then… does that mean you're actually serious about me?" I asked, again a little bit afraid of what his answer might be. After leaving me this gift and that note, surely he couldn't really fuck with my feelings again?

"I… Yeah, I mean I really want to be but I guess that's really up to you more than it is me. You're the one who has to decide if you like me that way or not…" he said, not meeting my eyes, though I wish he would. I wanted to see passed him and look _inside_ of him.

I bit my lip at that. Clearly, after reading Tommy's note, I was a lot more interested in him than I was before. My heart was lurching out towards him and I couldn't stop it. How could I ignore such strong feelings? "Well… if you can accept all of my… differences…" I whispered. If Tommy and I were really going to be a… _a thing_ he had to know that I wasn't like anyone else he'd been with. Not just because he was used to women but because I was just different. I wasn't a normal human being. At all.

Tommy frowned up at me and he took my hand into his, pulling me down onto his bed next to him. "Adam, everyone has their differences… I'm sure whatever it is isn't that big of a deal," he said.

"Well this is a little bit of an extreme," I whispered, looking away.

"Then let's talk about it," he said.

My heart spoke before my logic could grab hold of me. "Well, if you… have sex with me, then you'll know exactly what I mean," I said. I couldn't believe I'd just said that. I'd only considered dating Tommy for the last hour and a half and _that_ slipped out of my mouth? Alright, I suppose I've always been sexually attracted to Tommy, I just wouldn't let myself get stuck in that situation. Now that I knew Tommy did have feelings for me. Well…

"Wait, are you suggesting that we-?" A look of awe covered Tommy's face.

I nodded, blushing wildly. "Yeah, I guess so but you… might not want to after you see what…" I stopped, the heat in my cheeks rising a little more.

Tommy laughed quietly. "Adam, if it's cause you've got a small dick, I don't care," he said and my eyes went wide. I'd been called a lot of things over the years but nobody has ever suggested that I have a small dick.

"No! No, it isn't that at all. I don't have a small dick…" I said, laughing kind of awkwardly.

"Then… what is it?" he asked and I just shook my head, leaning over and pressing my lips to the older boys for a minute.

"You'll… figure it out," I muttered against his lips and slipped my tongue between his teeth. He wouldn't believe me if I told him anyway… He'd have to see for himself and then he'd have to decide if he wanted to keep a freak like me around or toss me away. If he did that latter, I was leaving this campus, for good.

He moaned into my lips and his fingers tangled into the back of my hair. He laid back, pulling me down on top of him as our tongues battled for dominance. Maybe I haven't had as much sexual experience as Tommy, but I sure did a lot of mouth fucking, so I easily overpowered him. He tugged at my hair and I whined, much like a puppy might do. Tommy chuckled into our kiss, his fingers moving up into my hair. His hit something that twitched and, at first, he didn't seem to notice it, but his playing with my hair repeatedly hit it and after a couple more twitches, he pulled away and I whined again. I didn't realize what had happened until I opened my eyes and saw Tommy staring at my, his eyes wide.

I blushed wildly. "What…?" I asked, looking away. I was already growing hard and Tommy picked a really fucking awful time to pull away from the kiss! Bastard…

"Ear…" he mutter, reaching out and grabbing the top of my head, which was actually a black, triangular dog ear. I didn't have regular ears, my hair just hid that detail, as well as my real ears, which Tommy just found. My blush deepened and I felt… ashamed.

"This is what I was trying to tell you about… I'm not really… normal…" I said quietly. He didn't say a word, and for a minute, I thought I was being rejected but then the fingers touching my ear started scratching it gently and I whimpered, tilting my head into his hand like a dog might nudge his head against someone, wanting to be pet. "Tommy…"

He only chuckled and continued petting my ear, eventually scratching gently between them, which only felt more… amazing. My ears were sensitive, I liked having them touched and played with. Drake and Hiei both drove me crazy in our passionate moments by playing with them while we were, to put it lightly, fucking. "Tommy… Don't you get it? I'm like… part dog!"

"I can see that…" he said, his other hand coming up to pet my ears as well.

"It's not…to weird… cause I understand if it is…" I whispered, my heart preparing itself for the blow.

But it never came.

"It's weird, I'll admit that but it doesn't stop me from wanting to be with you," he said, looking me in the eye and smiling. His fingers trailed down my spine and he pulled the fabric of my tank up, wanting to take it off of me, which I allowed. It wasn't like I could actually protest. I was too confused.

"You may not be saying that once you see my tail…" I whispered and he laughed, forcing another blush to make its appearance.

Yes…" I whispered quietly.

Tommy stopped laughing and he looked me in the eye, a light blush running across his face. "May I.. see it?" he asked. My blush remained, but I nodded and stood up, holding my breath as I undid my jeans. They were tight, but I was able to get them off quickly and I stood there, completely exposed to him with my hands folded neatly in front of my still-making-itself-known hard on. My black tail curling around my left thigh. Tommy blushed even more. I wasn't really sure if that was a good sign, so I turned away.

"I… I'm sorry I'm such a freak…" I whispered and he was at my side in a second, taking my face gently into his hands.

"No baby… don't say that. You're fine," he whispered quietly.

"This doesn't bother you at all?" I asked, astonishment and amazement filling my eyes.

He smiled at me, rubbing circles into my cheek and I had to wonder where the Tommy I knew had gone to cause it couldn't have possibly been this man. "No Adam, I think it's really cute," he said, kissing me gently.

"Really?" I asked, my heart swelling.

He chuckling, kissing me again. "Really."

My heart (and hard on) spoke, once again before my logic could stop it. "Then… fuck me?"


	12. Trusting Desire, Starting To Learn

**Chapter Twelve: Trusting desire, starting to learn (walking through fire without a burn)**

**Tommy's POV**

My heart was racing in my chest I pressed kisses into Adam's hair, running fingers down his spine and along his tail— his _tail_. Fuck, the man I was in love with was part _dog_. This was something like out of the fucking Maximum Ride novels by James Patterson— yes, I do read, fuck off. Human experimentation or some shit like that? Oh, fuck, what if Adam had been, like, experimented on when he was younger? No, stop.

I didn't care about that. The only thing that I did care about was the fact that Adam accepted my apology, accept my love, and in return I accepted the fact that he was different. I cared about him too much to let something like this to come between us. True, it was really, _really_ fucking weird that my boyfriend (teehee, boyfriend) had ears and a tail that you'd really only find on a dog, but… To be honest?

It kinda turned me on.

I mean— don't get me wrong, I'm not into beastiality and shit like that, but, like, when Brad and I fooled around now and then, we'd mess around with roleplay and whatnot. Cat ears, tails, slave shit— not that I should really get into my sex life, but I'm just saying, it's sexy to me. But with Adam, it's even more so because… They're real. They're fucking real. I can touch them and pull on them and get a real reaction out of him because of it. Just like now, stroking his tail and he whined just like a dog.

I smirked as Adam's hands clawed at the hem of my shirt, pulling it up over my head. I dipped down, kissing him hard and dirty; one hand went up to cup his face, the other trailed light down his hip and across his thigh. He arched up into me, whining into my lips. My tongue pushed between his teeth as his hands fumbled with the button and zipper of my jeans. I gasped, giving him the opportunity to slide it tongue between my teeth. I moaned as he rolled us over, pinning me down onto the mattress.

"Fucking hell, Tommy. We gotta get you out of those jeans," Adam hissed into my neck, pulling down on the waistband of my pants. I groaned, arching up into him as he peeled my jeans away, tossing them away before his fingers left blistering trails into my skin. My jaw dropped and I gasped again, biting down on my bottom lip as his lips attacked my throat, biting and sucking.

My eyes were screwed shut and I yelped softly, reaching up into his hair and pulling sharply on it. Adam let go of my neck, crying out softly and I smirked, flipping us over so that I was on top again. Sorry, Adam. Tonight you're my bitch…

"Tommy…" Adam moaned, before choking on a gasp as I ground into his hips with mine. I pressed a soft kiss to his throat, blindly reaching down under the bed, searching— searching— there! My fingers curled around a thin, long bottle with a plastic cap before bringing it back up onto the bed. I shifted, flipping the tab and squeezing lube out onto my fingers, smearing an even coat onto the digits before kissing Adam on the lips again.

"Baby… Fuck," Adam whined and I smiled, kissing him again. His lips were so soft and addictive, I couldn't get enough of them.

"I know, baby. I know," I murmured. I didn't need to force his legs apart, he practically fell open for me and I moaned. It was incredible how much our situation how changed. Before all I could think about was getting between his thighs and then just ditching. But now? Now I was getting the chance to hold him, kiss him, touch him and do it _repeatedly_. There was more to it, now. There's was feeling. There was love.

I nudged a finger around his entrance, trembling at the heat of it and moaning softly. Adam, reflexively, tightened at first before relaxing. I smiled, feeling a blush run across my face as I slid the finger into him, feeling the tension as he went rigid, moaning softly before relaxing.

I whispered sweetness into his ears, sucking on his neck and leaving kisses into his skin as I worked him open. He was tight around my fingers, warm and slick but eventually I managed to get three fingers in without too much strain or difficulty. Adam was a panting, shaking mess by the time I was done, but he was, effectively, ready. Physically, anyway. But… I still had to make sure..

"Adam, baby? Are you… Do you want this? For real?" I whispered into his neck, kissing the spot just beneath where a human ear would be. He whined, his fingers digging into my hips and panting hard. His erection was flush, pressing up into my stomach and making me bite back a soft moan, along with the urge to reach down and just palm him into oblivion.

"Yes, fuck.. _Please, Tommy_…" He groaned, eyes squeezed shut and chest rising and falling. I bit down on my bottom lip again, caressing his cheek with my thumb before kissing him gentle.

"I don't have any condoms…" I admitted. Adam inhaled slowly, shaking his head. I frowned, though he didn't see because his eyes were still closed as he tried to calm his breathing down to a more normal pace. I continued caressing his cheeks as he shook his head again, looking up at me through a veil of his hair.

"I don't care… I trust you." He said, breathing deeply. I felt my heart skip a beat as I bent down, pressing my lips to his in a soft, chaste kiss. No tongue, no lip biting, just soft. Soft and sweet and expressing so much love.

"I love you," I whispered into his lips. Adam moaned as I started to pull away, and he grabbed me by the hair, bringing me down to his lips again. His tongue split the seam of my lips, diving into my mouth. My eyes slid shut as a moan erupted from my throat. Adam's fingers tightened in my hair, pulling gently. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as I shifted against him, grinding slightly and moaning again.

"I love you, too," Adam said after pulling away. I smiled slightly, chuckling as my heart thrashed in my chest. I shifted, prodding up into him. I pushed in slowly, judging how quickly to move based on Adam's moans. But eventually, I made it all the way in, taking it slow and steady, letting him adjust. He kept tightening around me, sending shivers down to the base of my spine and making me trembling.

Slow, sweet motions and just as soft of kisses until I hit that spot inside of Adam and he arched, his chest pressed to mine as he cried out. His hands wrapped around, digging into my back as I moved inside of him, nipping and licking at his neck. Adam's face was screwed into pleasured ecstasy and I bit down on my bottom lip, thrusting harder into him and hitting that spot again.

"Fuck!" Adam hissed, raking his nails down my back. I winced, pressing my face into the curve of Adam's neck, holding tightly to his hips. I breathed hard in and out through my mouth, occasionally biting onto Adam's neck or shoulder, just out of reaction from what our bodies were doing or feeling. Adam would dig into my back, and I would bite him in return.

I slammed up into him, his body curving into mine as he cried out, "Tommy… To— Tommy… fuck, please…" He whined, his ears flat against his head and his tail curled around his leg, taught and tense. I nodded, breathing into his skin and reaching down to grab his member, giving pumps in time with the motion of my hips. Adam wasn't even making coherent noises at that point, not that I minded. No matter what sound or word he made, it went straight to the nether regions, making me dizzy with pleasure.

"Tommy… I… I…" I kissed his neck, feeling weak with my own approaching release.

"I know, baby… I know… Come on, Adam. Come for me… I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere…" I whispered, not even really sure what I was saying, but it sounded good and it sounded right and that was all that mattered. Adam dug a hand into my hair, dragging me into a kiss as a few more thrusts and pumps and we were both coming undone at the seams.

We slowed to a stop, the high of our pleasure wearing off as I pulled out of Adam. He gasped, trembling as I grabbed a corner of the blanket, wiping our stomachs off before pulling up a different side around us. No sense in tucking a soggy corner into our comfort, now, was there? No, didn't think so.

I hovered over Adam, resting my forehead against his as we breathed. Light kisses were exchanged as I palmed his face in my hand. One of his came up and covered mine before pulling it away, our fingers lacing together. I smiled softly, kissing him again as I curled up to his side, his arms wrapping around me. He moaned softly in discomfort, and I stroked his hair gently.

"You know…" he began, "I've never bottomed before." He admitted, a blush on his cheeks. If I wasn't so tired, I'd have been wide eyed in shock, for sure. But there was also a part of me that understood. Adam didn't seem like a bottom type of person. It was amazing that he let me take him at all.

"Oh, God, baby, I… I'm sorry…" I muttered, caressing his cheek gently. He just smiled and shook his head, pressing his lips to my fingers.

"It's alright… It's a new experience. It's just… My previous boyfriends were about your size or so, maybe a tad smaller, but they were more… passive, if you know what I mean," he commented and I smiled, blushing slightly. My heart was still pounding hard in my chest, but that was more or less for the aftermath adrenaline.

"Well, next time you can top. I can go both ways… I'm not always so forceful," I said with a smirk and Adam laughed gently, leaning over and kissing my cheek gently. His lips were warm and soft, and I couldn't resist turning my head to taste them again. I moaned softly as Adam's tongue slid along my lower lip from corner to corner before passing between my teeth, tasting my tongue before sliding out again.

"I'm excited to see a passive Tommy Joe Ratliff," Adam smirked, licking his lips a little and I felt my face heat up.

"Oh really?" I asked, pulling him closer, almost on top of me. Adam chuckled, kissing my neck.

"Absolutely. But, baby, we've got the rest of winter… The rest of this year and more to come for that…" My heart fluttered in my chest against his, and I was sure that he felt it. The idea of spending more time with Adam made me feel light with happiness, and I smiled euphorically, kissing him again.

"I can't wait."


End file.
